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OPINION
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Stacey Abrams Is Displeased

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
AP Photo/Brynn Anderson

Not sure if you got your new, Democrat-approved copy of the Bible, the one where “Adam and Eve” are replaced by “Adam and someone else we can’t identify until a biologist comes along,” but in it you will find the new commandments. Those commandments are ever-changing, a “living document,” if you will, of left-wing mandates and bans of the moment. Currently, the most pressing commandment is “Thou shalt not disappoint Stacey Abrams.” 

Abrams, the current Governor-in-exile of Georgia, is the patron saint of hypocrisy in the Democrat Party. While they attack anyone who has difficulty swallowing the idea that 81 million Americans would vote for a senile old man who was already dumber than Forrest Gump before his dementia kicked in, Stacey gets honorary degrees and is cheered by media types for her struggle for “voting rights.” 

See, it’s “voting rights” when a Democrat questions election results, it’s a threat to democracy when a Republican does.

Anyway, the blessings of Abrams are more sought after than an audience with the Pope, even by supposed Catholics like Nancy Pelosi and Joe Biden (when they aren’t out raising money to fund abortions, like the “good, devout Catholics” they are, or something). She is a superhero to the left. You can tell they’re the party of participation trophies and not keeping score by the way they celebrate losers.

The Democratic Governors Association, the official party organ created to elect Democrat governors, is invoking Stacey’s name to dip into the pockets of their idiotic supporters.

“This is not good,” the subject line reads in a Saturday email from the name “Stacey Abrams Alert.”

“Donald Trump is in Georgia RIGHT NOW to hold a rally for one of Stacey’s far-right opponents. He’s attacking Stacey, and we have to be ready to fight back,” they open. “Stacey Abrams herself called for grassroots donors like you to take action and give whatever they can – and now, donations are going THROUGH THE ROOF!”

They underlined “herself,” likely because capitalizing the “H” would’ve been a little too “on the nose” for them, but they’ll get there.

It’s rather odd to me that they’re bragging about how much money they’re raking in – “THROUGH THE ROOF!” – while begging people for more. Shouldn’t the alleged piles they’re falling over because Jabba the Governor commanded the peons to tithe be enough, at least for the moment, especially with gas prices and inflation so high? Silly, Democrats don’t give a damn about people’s suffering, they want their money. Nothing else matters.

They continue, “Please, answer Stacey's call and rush a donation before our midnight deadline to keep this momentum going, defeat GOP extremists, and elect Democrats across the country!”

This email was sent Saturday, March 26th. There is no deadline anywhere in politics that occurs on a non-end of the month or end of the quarter Saturday, they’re just making it up to give it a sense of urgency. “Our deadline is approaching, and if you don’t give by it we could lose everything!” It’s a scam, but one they use all the time.

Then comes the hard push. “Last year, more than 440 bills that would restrict our right to vote were introduced across the country,” the DGA lies. “American democracy is under attack right now – perhaps nowhere more so than in Georgia, where Governor Brian Kemp is doing everything he can to make it harder for Georgians to vote – especially people of color. The GOP knows that their extremist agenda isn’t popular at the ballot box, but they can't accept the will of the people – so they're SUPPRESSING voters instead!”

They never explain how reaching into your pocket to show your driver’s license is oppressive, “especially” for “people of color,” but being Democrats means they don’t have to. Democrats, especially white Democrats, believe black people are idiots who need white liberals to look out for them. They pretty much say it out in the open all the time. 

It concludes, “Please, answer Stacey's call to defend democracy by rushing an emergency donation – whatever you can give – to help us hit our $35,000 fundraising goal to expand our blue firewall, STOP Republican extremism, and elect Democrats across the country!” 

Yes, the siren call of Stacey Abrams, patron saint of lying and hypocrisy. What will $35,000 do? Buy a 30-second ad on a small market TV station? Cover the hooker budget for a weekend DGA retreat? Handle the tip for a Stacey Abrams dinner meeting?

In the grand scheme of things, it means nothing, it’s a tiny amount in national politics. From January through October of 2021, an off-year, the DGA bragged about raising $54 million, so $35k is just a lie chosen to seem small and attainable, hoping to con suckers into contributing. 

The whole damn thing is a scam, and sitting at the front of it is Saint Stacey. She shall not be displeased! 

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