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OPINION

Peter Pan-ism, Tax Evasion, and Tide Pod-Popping Illiterates: The Face of Progressivism Today

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP

There comes a point in every boy’s life when he realizes that he has become stronger than his mother. If he’s been raised right, or is otherwise just a respectful young man, then that’s not a problem. If he isn’t, if he continues to behave like a child after the point his mother can physically overpower him, then there are problems for everyone. 

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Unfortunately, the latter scenario seems to be the state of affairs these days, as the rebellious left has contaminated virtually every American institution. Even hold-outs like professional sports, corporate America, and the military have been infected by the woke mind-virus, a childish incontinence with no end goal except rebellion.  

The so-called progressive left has used phrases like “tear the system down!” so much that they don’t even think about it – and they’ve grown so strong that no one can stop them. Out-of-control crime, failing banks, failed schools, an unavoidable recession, and so many other problems that we don’t even bother to hyperlink them anymore. 

There are no grown-ups in hopelessly blue prison-cities like Chicago or San Francisco, prompting a mass exodus to greener, or rather redder, pastures. No one wants to be the one to stop and say, “Hey, we can do this … but maybe we shouldn’t” because no Democrat wants to be that guy: none of them want to be the RA. 

This nascent Peter Pan-ism, in part, explains why Democrats got away in 2022 with nothing but a slap on the wrist. The problem isn’t too much radicalism – it’s not enough. Liberal hypocrisy isn’t the reason for San Franciso’s horrifying income inequality – it’s because we haven’t torn down capitalism. 

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What’s worse is the fact that Republicans members of Congress get distracted by the celebrity that these activists have achieved and engage with them in the hopes of persuading them to see reason. They get distracted by their celebrity spokespeople I guess hopeful that they will be seen as part of the “cool kids.”

Even those who are capable of seeing the dangers inherent in this movement – Andrew Yang, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Bill Maher – aren’t quite capable of becoming Republican. (The only way Sen. Kyrsten Sinema might save her political career might be if she actually does.) 

If Pres. Joe Biden were still the sensible guy he was in the Senate, he’d have nothing to do with the childish maniacs who’ve inherited his party … which actually makes him the perfect puppet for the systemic dismantling of our system: he’s too senile to understand what’s going on. He’s like the old man in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood who doesn’t realize hippy girls like AOC have take over his cowboy ranch. 

Even some traditional liberal spokespeople are realizing they need to grow up before it’s too late. Although he had to pretend the very phrase was abhorrent, U2 front-man Bono last year admitted the only solution to extreme poverty is “entrepreneurial capitalism.” So that’s something. 

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But progressives have progressed well beyond guys like him! 

More attention now is showered on ilk like Lizzo, a Democrat activist who checks a lot of progressive boxes. But she’s not the only mega-millionaire celebrity who’s been engaged to fight … inequality. Joseph Antonio Cartagena AKA Fat Joe has been hired as the spokesman for ultra-left Power to the Patients. The group advocates for price transparency, which went into law January 2021. 

In the short time since it passed, 70 percent of hospitals are compliant with the transparency requirements, according to a report from Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS), but that’s not fast enough for PttP and Fat Joe. Now their focus is attacking hospitals, with Fat Joe even calling them criminals. 

In that regard at least Joe is an expert, as in 2012 he pled guilty to tax evasion. After paying Uncle Sam the $3 million he owed, he served a short prison term. Now he’s the face for socialized medicine, lectures people who will never have $3 million, let alone enough to owe $3 million in taxes. 

One of Fat Joe’s more articulate protest rallies was one where he simply said “F--- Trump,” which doesn’t seem destined to the kind of timeless as that turn, turn song from 60s. Yet despite his open hostility to Republicans and criminal record, members of the party are actually considering meeting with him on Capitol Hill today to discuss his thoughts on health care. I hope this conference room is empty when he does come to town. 

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All of a sudden Lizzo doesn’t seem like such a crazy spokesperson. 

So, this is the place we find ourselves in right now. Progressives aren’t just stronger than their mom now: they’re stronger than mom, dad, aunt, and uncle. And grandpa is sleeping so he has enough energy to watch TV with AOC after her daily tantrum. 

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