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OPINION

Stick a Fork in Santorum... He's Done

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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I think the fog of the campaign war is getting to Santorum because he said last Thursday in San Antone that there is “little difference” between Romney and Obama, and we might as well stick with Barack. “Little” my skinny white backside! Dial down, Richard. I think Santorum should have stayed down in Puerto Rico for an extra couple days of R&R to gain his composure because the disparity betwixt Mitt & B. Hussein is humongous.

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Now, for the record I’m not a Romney cheerleader; I voted for Newt in the Florida primary, hoping against hope that maybe, just maybe, we’d get to see Gingrich dust Obama in the presidential debates. But alas, that ain’t going to happen.

That said, if Rick were to get the nod (which he probably won’t), I would vote for him versus BHO any ol’ day. For that matter, if my uncle Slappy Giles, who sells moon crickets and Chattahoochee jig worms down by Harper’s Swamp, were the GOP’s pick, I’d vote for that toothless, brainless bastard because I know he at least digs America and that for which she stands. Obama? Let’s just say I’m getting a different read.

Now, before the Santorumites queue up to send me their hate mail, do you really, really think there’s very little difference between Romney and Obama?

Look, I get it. BHO will bash Mitt for his Romneycare hypocrisy. And I know Mitt, heretofore, changed his political mind every two years. And like the Visa Card, historically he has been everywhere you want him to be. But to say that he’s the same as Obama is like saying getting kicked in the nuts by a two-year-old is the same as getting kicked in the nuts by Chuck Norris. Yes, our boys might get pummeled, but there is a huge difference in the extent and depth of pain and damage delivered by a Chuck versus a child, capice?

For instance, do you guys who buy this “little difference” nonsense think that Romney will bypass Congress and give Egypt’s bat crap crazy America/Israel-hating Muslim Brotherhood $1.5 billion for their demented military? I don’t.

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Also, I don’t think Mitt is going to get endorsements from Hamas, various and ubiquitous communist parties at home and abroad, nor from Hollywood and their America-loathing lovelies. Nor do I believe Romney would run up our debt and destabilize our economy like BHO has purposely done.

Here’s the difference, at least to me, between Mitt and Barack: Obama is a disaster with the caps lock ON. Romney, I believe—and so did Santorum in 2008—will be a true relief from the socialism BHO’s been trying to saddle us with these last three debt-addled years. However, if it turns out that Mitt, too, should suck, I will dare to predict that what he’ll do in the White House will suck less than the subterranean suckiness that we are dealing with now. What do you think, Dinky?

In summation, I’m in agreement with the late Andrew Breitbart, who told me last February at CPAC at the hotel bar that he is for “anybody but Obama!”

*Check out my new video—Wisdom from Doug: Skinny Jeans.

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