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The Bulwark Wants Kids At Sex Shows, and Bill Kristol Forgets Who Is President Again

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03.16.23

Pathological Media Amnesia – THE BULWARK

  • When an opinion on an invasion is worse than the person permitting said invasion.

Bill Kristol has a strong opinion about the stance Ron DeSantis took regarding the Ukraine invasion. Bill seems to think his stance of slowing down our aid and being sure not to engage directly is a disqualifying position for the presidency.

Kristol declares that DeSantis is supposedly on the "wrong side of the defining foreign policy issue of our time." I need to offer a reminder now (to Bill, not our readers) that Obama did next to nothing, and it led to the invasion of Crimea. And then, following four years of no activity, we see a new conflict in the region, basically ushered in by…whom, Bill?

Gilded Reframe – SACRAMENTO BEE

On Tuesday, Charlie Kirk gave a speech on the campus of UC Davis, and there was enough pre-speech antipathy in the press that Antifa arrived and caused violence, as is the usual tactic; the people claiming to battle fascism act out in a notably fascist manner of wanting to restrict speech.

Ahead of his speech, the Sacramento Bee published an op-ed that claimed Kirk had called for the lynching of trans people. This was called inciteful language, and Kirk demanded a retraction under threat of a lawsuit, and the paper delivered a lengthy clarification at the end of the column.

  • "An earlier version of this column included a statement that Charlie Kirk had 'called for the lynching of trans people.' The basis for this accusation is a video clip in which Kirk was upset that a trans woman had won an NCAA swimming championship. In the clip, Kirk said that instead of letting the woman compete, 'Someone should have took (sic) care of it the way we used to take care of things in the 1950s and 60s.' Some trans advocates on social media extrapolated from Kirk's comments that he called for trans people to be lynched - an accusation The Bee repeated. But a review of the video shows that Kirk never advocated for trans people to be lynched. In fact, he strongly denies the accusation. These notes have been added to the column. The Bee regrets its comments and we apologize for any misunderstanding this earlier version may have caused."

Note that in the correction stipulating they were incorrect to accuse Kirk of calling for lynching, the paper still manages to mention Kirk calling for lynching no less than three times.

Artisanally-Crafted Narratives – THE BULWARK

  • So any politician banning kids from sexually-graphic events is a fascist -–THIS is your argument?!

Oh dear, the former conservative pin-up Amanda Carpenter is still struggling with the rising import of Ron DeSantis. Mandy is perturbed by the action taken purportedly by the governor in retaliation to a holiday event where drag queens were performing lascivious acts with children once again.

This week, the media is really bothered by the news that in Florida, a hotel has had its liquor license stripped following an adult-themed drag show. There are claims of government oppression – of course – but there are details the media choose to avoid. 

This was not a reactionary move; the hotel was told ahead of time that an adult-themed show listed as "all ages" was not permissible under its liquor laws. Carpenter, in linking to a piece by her cohort JV Last, supported the claim that all that had to be done was have the producers of the show remove the all-ages tag in the advertising. Except, Carpenter and Last have to ignore the section where the hotel was clearly told it, as the venue was responsible for ensuring underage kids did not attend an adult-themed revue.

DNC PR Firm – DAILY BEAST

We have some gripping and explosive news from the 2024 presidential campaign trail concerning the candidate – er, nope – rather, the man who has not even announced his presidential campaign. Yes, it is a new day which means there is fresh Ron DeSantis distemper to be found in the press. Today is the latest scandal, "The Pudding Incident."

Jake Lahut, a writer who is seemingly not polluted with an abundance of pride, has reported on a severe incident exposing deep character flaws that should make any voter pause. DeSantis, according to unnamed former staffers, once ate pudding in a room full of people using his fingers.

Matching Media Memorandum – POLITICO

  • This will go far to establish Jon as a serious pundit.

As nonsensical and non-impactful as this pudding scandal appears, Jonathan Lemire felt the need to join in and share this deeply trenchant piece of news.

Pulitzer Prize Nomination – SCIENCE MAGAZINE

  • This sounds like the basis of any film on the SyFy Channel.

There is certainly a deeply valid purpose for this kind of research, we have been led to believe. After all, we have been lectured loudly during the pandemic to always follow the science with a religious fervor. So the announcement that researchers have developed a way for mice to grow antlers has to be absorbed with the most rapturous of awe and applause.

So there is your update if anyone has been curious why it is taking so long to cure cancer.

Glossary Over Things – TOURÉ

  • Admittedly saying 'The W-word' is a bit clunky…

Want all the proof that the battle against the virtue-signaling activist set is netting results? Here we have the always wise pundit Touré declaring that anyone using the term "woke" is actually employing the use of a slur. Yes, seriously.

Of course, it needs to be ignored that this is a term that is derived from the left – you know, from the very woke individuals who push and promote the agenda. Now that others are using it effectively to combat their activist nonsense, it has to become contorted that anyone using it today is acting bigoted or something.

This is why DeSantis is getting smeared with pudding scandals – if he is elected, we will start seeing segregated water fountains with signs dictation FOR WOKE PEOPLE ONLY.


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