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OPINION
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Democrats Keep Beating Expectations on the Failure Scale

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AP Photo/Meg Kinnard

They keep coming. Not waves of Taliban fighters overrunning surrendering Afghanistan forces or retreating Americans, but the insane fundraising emails from left-wing groups so stupid that their mere existence saps whatever remaining faith in humanity you may have. You read these things, as insanely written as they are, and think “How does this work on anyone?” There is no good answer.

I’ve written about this before, but for some reason Democrats are obsessed with the Postmaster General, a guy named Louis DeJoy. This week came more random attacks and smears. 

The group Stop Republicans sent an email reading, “BREAKING: Trump’s Postmaster General DeJoy STEALS USPS funding, dragging it to the brink of BANKRUPTCY The USPS is on the brink of collapse, Derek. And DeJoy is stealing crucial money all for himself!   The only way to save the USPS from RUIN is to fire him!!!” The writing style of a 13-year-old girl texting her friends aside, if DeJoy is stealing money you should call the police, not shoot off a fundraising email. 

The people these emails work on are so dumb, pitches like “We need [7] local Democrats to sign our urgent petition to FIRE Louis DeJoy. Will you sign before midnight, Derek?” work. Of course, you can’t “sign” their petition without giving them money. Weird, right?

That, however, was just the tip of the crazy. The National Democratic Training Committee is pushing the idea of Hillary Clinton running for Governor of New York. It makes sense, right – a sexual assault enabler replacing a sexual assaulter. Actually, it doesn’t make any sense. But being a left-winger doesn’t have to make sense, it just has to work. 

This email is pretending to be a poll, it even has a countdown clock that start as soon as you open it, giving you one hour to respond to the poll. That the counter resets every time you open it doesn’t seem to bother people dumb enough to think their opinion is desperately needed. 

What I find funniest is disgraced Democrat Governor of New York Andrew Cuomo just announced his resignation, and these leftists send an email reading, “So when we heard there was an open governorship in New York, we immediately thought she would be PERFECT for the job.” When they heard there was going to be an opening in New York? How’d that opening come about? Someone die? Was the current Governor term limited out office? 

Naturally, when you go to submit your “poll answer” you’re hit up for cash.

Finally, an email from the Democratic Strategy Institute, whatever the hell that is, brings panic to a new level. Their email reads, “We told you that with Republicans destroying voting rights, disqualifying Trump from running in 2024 is the ONLY way to stop him from winning. We told you we needed 100,000 Democrats to sign our petition DISQUALIFYING Trump from running. But Derek -- you did NOTHING! Unless we disqualify Trump from running in 2024, he could easily sail to re-election thanks to Republican voter suppression!”

It’s true, I did nothing. But how vacant does the head of a reader have to be for those words to carry weight? 

The email ends with, “This is your final notice: SIGN THE PETITION TO DISQUALIFY TRUMP FROM RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT IN 2024.” 

Curiously, the email, nor the website clicking their link takes you to, explains how Trump can be disqualified from running for anything, but when you’re dealing with dumb people there are no follow-up questions asked. 

Just one example of the questions their “petition” asks is, “Does it concern you there are still Republicans in Congress 100% committed to carrying out Trump’s legacy and ruining Joe Biden’s presidency?” I told you it was stupid, didn’t I?

What’s weird is the websites these emails, and a lot of the others, take you to if you click their links all look remarkably similar – like there’s either one template for effectively conning stupid people out of their money, or they’re run by the same people who are just coming up with new groups to fool people into giving more. I don’t know what the answer is, but I wouldn’t put anything past people willingly lying to people the way they are. 

Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!), host of a daily radio show on WCBM in Maryland, and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter

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