Emmett Tyrrell

WASHINGTON -- So intense have the Republicans' suspicions of their Democratic rivals become in the last weeks of this presidential race that they now are accusing the delightful Democratic vice presidential candidate, Sen. Joe Biden, of withholding the results of his brain scans from his recently released medical records. Their charge is false. The results of those brain scans are spread across several pages of the senator's records for all to see. Admittedly, those pages appear to be blank, but what did the Republicans expect? Have they not been listening to the great man's solemnities on the campaign trail?

In an interview with his fellow airhead CBS' Katie Couric late in September, the senior senator from Delaware expressed his firm belief that Franklin Delano Roosevelt was president of the United States in 1929 and that in that illusory year, FDR had at his command a large and apparently receptive television audience. Ha, ha, ha -- and the mainstream moron media insist that Sen. Biden's opponent, Gov. Sarah Palin, "stumbled" when she was interviewed by CBS' cutie. Stumble Gov. Palin might have, but Sen. Biden fell head over heels, and he has continued to do so.

There have been his repeated bold intimations that while flying over Afghanistan in a helicopter he was forced down by enemy fire. Actually, the threat was from inclement weather. Or savor this: Despite being caught years ago plagiarizing a British Labour leader's public recollections of life in the Welsh coal mines, Sen. Biden again has rather incautiously recalled being a coal miner himself. His recollection is in error. Most deliciously, this month he yawped: "The No. 1 job facing the middle class, and it happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: jobs, J-O-B-S, jobs." Possibly the senator's handlers have told him to avoid four-letter words on the campaign trail. At any rate, for those of us who enjoy a laugh, Sen. Biden's campaign has been a picnic.

Now he apparently is collaborating with the McCain-Palin campaign in stressing Sen. Barack H. Obama's inexperience. "We're going to have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy," Sen. Biden warned, referring to his running mate, Sen. Obama, the least experienced presidential nominee in more than 100 years. Oh, wait. I forgot Wendell Willkie, "the barefoot boy from Wall Street," who ran against FDR, the television pioneer.

Emmett Tyrrell

R. Emmett Tyrrell Jr. is founder and editor in chief of The American Spectator and co-author of Madame Hillary: The Dark Road to the White House.
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