There’s nothing like a good deadline to get things done, right? When I was in school, no matter how much time I had, or how high my hopes were for that time, I ended up writing pretty much every paper required of me the night before it was due. We didn’t have the internet, we didn’t even have a computer, all we had was an early 1960s set of Funk & Wagnalls encyclopedias. I wore those suckers out, even if all their information was out of date. Desperation does weird things to people, and deadlines help impose that desperation.
In politics, the deadlines are irrelevant, really. But they do help impose desperation, at least for show, which is used to create a false sense of urgency. It’s a great tool to use on dumb people.
Throughout an election campaign, the fundraising team uses any or all of the following:
End of week deadline. Mid-week deadline. Friday at midnight deadline. Mid-month deadline. End of month deadline. Saturday deadline. And the ever-popular End of quarter deadline.
There are more, of course, people unbound by honesty aren’t bound by reality. But the “End of quarter deadline” is one of the more popular ones because it’s the closest thing to a real deadline these people have. The day after the end of the quarter, every single one of these grifters would happily take your credit card information, and are often back with “We need to start off this new quarter huge!” emails, because they live to get into your wallet.
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But the end of the quarter is when campaigns have to report to the Federal Election Commission how much money they raised and where it comes from. It’s usually treated as news, so campaigns want big numbers to give the impression of momentum.
Since most of these people never really have to “earn” media on the left – they can count on their press releases being printed almost verbatim – this is mostly an exercise in grabbing cash.
For the final week of September, for example, the campaign of the detestable Adam Schiff sent 17 emails, including one they pretended was from dogs – the “Spokespups for Schiff.” (Have I mentioned these people are pathetic and their donors are morons?)
Schiff sent 5 emails the last day of September alone, including one with a fake text exchange between him and his campaign manager at 11:04 pm Saturday night. “Hey Adam,” Brad the campaign manager writes, “I just ran the numbers. We are about 94% of the way to our September fundraising goal. Do you think this team could handle another task?”
Schiff “responds” to Brad, “If anyone can, it’s our amazing supporters – they are the best grassroots team anywhere. I’ll send a final email tonight.”
You have to currently be high on crack to believe people in campaigns talk to each other that way. But I’m sure it worked. You’ll always be surprised by how much money people can make off a small, dedicated group of idiots.
Then there’s the queen of grifting: Nancy Pelosi. She “stepped down” as Speaker of the House, but only in name. She wanted to be the face of the party to be a black man, presumably thinking this racial pandering would make up for generations of damaging policies, but she didn’t give up the power or control. She’s still calling the shots.
Nancy knows her base – dumb, rich white people – and how to play them. “NBC just broke the news” the subject line declared. What news? “Republicans have a RAZOR-THIN Majority in the House,” the email opens. “NBC just reported Democrats are going after THIRTY-ONE Republican seats. We only need to flip FIVE of those seats to take back the House. Just 5!!”
Talk about a scoop! NBC News “reported” what Democrats have been mentioning in their fundraising emails for almost a year! I hope all the presses are stopped!
This is what I mean when I talk about who stupid Democrats think their donors are, and what I mean when I say they have been even dumber than that because it clearly works.
None of these campaigns are going without money; they aren’t laying off staff or scaling back in any way.
“Suckers” isn’t a strong enough word, and “desperation” is fake because they aren’t really desperate, they’re simply opportunistic. Whatever these people truly are, evil has to be in the mix. What other type of person would do something like this?
