Burt Prelutsky

It seems to me that when it comes to foreign policy, the U.S. has two separate problems. To begin with, there are those two billion foreigners in places like China, Russia, North Korea and all the various Islamic nations that give America and much of the rest of the world non-stop migraines.

But compounding the problem for us are the millions of illegal aliens who have been flooding across our southern border for the past 25 years or so. It’s bad enough that they’ve placed a terrible burden on our schools, our prisons and our health care system. What makes it even worse is that they actually believe they’re somehow entitled. They don’t even think twice about demonstrating in the streets, demanding more and more of what I refer to as un-entitlements. I mean, who in the heck do they think they are? American teenagers?

If these folks are even stopped in public or in the workplace and asked to show proof of citizenship, the riff-raff at the ACLU scream “racism” and threaten to turn every traffic stop into a federal case. All I know is that after dealing at the same bank for the past eight or nine years, I’m still being asked for identification. I figure if I can live with it, so can they.

My wife gets upset every time she hears about all the foreign aid we’re bestowing on countries that hate our guts. God only knows how much national treasure we’ve doled out to the ungrateful likes of the Palestinians, the Yemenites and the Syrians, just so they can continue biting the hand that feeds them. If you think that’s not the case, just check out how infrequently they vote with us at the United Nations. It would be one thing if we were bribing these chiselers into compliance and putting a nice face on it by calling it foreign aid. But it’s obviously not working, so why do we continue handing out billions of our tax dollars? All it does is make America look like a little pisher who keeps having to fork over his milk money to the schoolyard bully.

In the case of Mexico, I’ve long suggested that we deduct the medical and penal expenses that their illegals are costing us from the check we stupid gringos send south every year. I haven’t the slightest doubt that Mexico would very quickly erect a 30-foot wall on their own side of the border. What’s more, President Calderon would probably man the machine gun nest personally.

Finally, there are two things I’d like to know. One: Why, with all their oil revenue, are we footing the bill to repair Iraq’s infrastructure, while I still have potholes on my street? And, two, I’d appreciate it if someone could explain why, after we’ve rescued the Iraqis and the Kuwaitis from the non-too tender mercies of Saddam Hussein, and have protected the worthless hides of the Saudi royal family for, lo, these many years, I’m paying more than 25 cents-a-gallon to fill my gas tank.