Joe Scarborough Really Stretched the Limits of Sanity With This Take on the...
Fiasco: NYC GOP Councilwoman Just Obliterated Mamdani Over the City's Shambolic Winter Sto...
CBS News Peddled Fake News About Bad Bunny and ICE Post-Super Bowl Performance
Yes, This Was the Best Response to John Kasich's Tweet About the Super...
A Bar Patron Had a Total Meltdown During the Super Bowl. The Reason...
Maybe We Should Be Glad Bad Bunny Performed in Spanish
Notice Where This Ex-ESPN Reporter's Attempt to Mock Conservatives Over Bad Bunny Laughabl...
Why Are Americans Fleeing Blue States for Red States?
A Maryland Squatter Walks Free — and Here's What Her Attorney Had...
AWFUL Who Harassed Yoga Studio Employees Over ICE Earned Herself a Ban
Deadline Tries to Guilt Trip John Lithgow for Starring in HBO's 'Harry Potter'...
Mayor Mamdani Becomes First NYC Leader to Skip Archbishop Installation in Almost a...
When Canadians Were Actually Funny
The Student ICE Walkouts Are a Troubling Reminder of How Revolutionaries Are Made
America’s Security Doesn’t End at the Ice’s Edge
Tipsheet

Spoiler Alert: Government Warns Pumpkins and Jack-o'-Lanterns Cause Global Warming

Are you preparing to participate in the fun filled holiday of Halloween this weekend? Did you carve pumpkins into Jack-o'-lanterns with your children, friends or family? Well, you should be ashamed of yourself. Don't you know that pumpkins cause global warming when they decay by emitting methane (the same thing emitted from the bowls of cows), which is a far more dangerous "greenhouse gas" than carbon dioxide? The government is here to warn you. 

Advertisement

From the Department of Energy website

At landfills, MSW [pumpkin] decomposes and eventually turns into methane—a harmful greenhouse gas that plays a part in climate change, with more than 20 times the warming effect of carbon dioxide (CO2). However, when MSW is used to harness bioenergy—rather than simply being thrown away—the end result benefits the environment and helps our nation become less dependent on carbon-based fuel. Harnessing the potential of bioenergy allows the United States to generate its own supply of clean energy that reduces greenhouse gas emissions. It also limits stress on landfills by reducing waste and could ultimately create jobs for manufacturing, installing, and maintaining energy systems.

And why not take the fun and creativity out of Halloween festivities by carving a public service message about global warming into your pumpkin so the neighbors can see it? After all, you need to make up for your environmental sin of purchasing a pumpkin in the first place. The Department of Energy is making it easy by providing energy friendly patterns.  

Advertisement
We also put together some energy-themed pumpkin patterns to help “energize” your neighborhood for Halloween. Send us photos of your energy-themed jack-o-lanterns via Twitter,Instagram, Facebook or email at newmedia@hq.doe.gov and we'll share our favorites.





And apparently, we should all be turning our pumpkins into fuel instead of throwing them away or allowing animals to eat them. What's next? A government mandated pumpkin recycling program?

Next thing you know, they'll be coming for our pumpkin pie!

Exit question: How much taxpayer money was spent on demeaning pumpkins and Halloween?

H/T Fox News

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Townhall Videos