Here's Your Square

Amanda Carpenter | January 17, 2009 10:20 AM

There's going to be an awful lot of check writing for the Democratic Party during the Inaugural balls this weekend. They'll be lavish events, with fancy people in fancy outfits eating fancy food. Nevermind the fact they're telling us how fast the nation's economy is crumbling down around us. There are parties to attend!

The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee will be hosting one of these exceptional bashes at the illustrious Mellon Auditorium on Monday. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has booked Jon Bon Jovi and Sherly Crow to entertain the party's most generous donors--which brings me to my question.

Will Miss Crow be using any more than a single square of toilet paper that evening?

After rudely confronting Karl Rove about global warming at the 2007 White House Correspondents Dinner, Crow wrote a blog for the Huffington Post telling everyone how they could contribute to saving the environment. She wrote, without kidding, that:

"I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares [sic] of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required."