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The Community Organizer Tries Theology

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of

Ash Wednesday 2015 was a perfect time for President Obama to lecture us about religion.

No, wait, that’s every day. Never gets old sitting at the knee of Baal, does it?


But Ash Wednesday’s call for repentance did happen to sync up with Obama’s hallowed summit on “extremism.” The Cultural-Marxist-in-chief grabbed the teleprompter microphone in the wake of a months-worth of severed heads and charred bodies, and unwrapped the mysteries of the universe for us.

Oh, what blessed diversity! There is no god but ourselves, and Obama is our messenger.

Some of us put sooty crosses on our forehead to mark our status as sinners in need of a Savior. Others write-off rivers of blood as the cost of doing business in a world without enough community organizers and job seminars to go around.

Amen, amen sayeth Obama: “No religion is responsible for violence and terrorism. People are responsible for violence and terrorism.”

Yep, pay no attention to those “Allahu Akbar’s” ringing in yours ears. Because It could have been any ol’ Joe from the Methodist church down the street executing infidels, don’t you know. Now let’s turn the white guilt up a notch and get some real repenting going on.

It’s all so confusing, I know, but don’t believe your lying eyes and ears. That Gospel message you may have heard on Ash Wednesday about not calling attention to yourself when engaging in prayer, fasting and almsgiving may not seem to jive with the “who gets to die next” videos being spammed out to the world these days. But Chris Wallace at Fox News doesn’t want us to get lost in the weeds here, so we’ll move on.


Remember, just people killing people (unless it’s an American killing Americans with guns – then it’s the gun’s fault). Please don’t make this anymore awkward by dragging religion into it.

And besides, don’t judge, Mr. Churchy. Maybe the terrorists just had a bad day. I mean, who among us hasn’t felt like cutting someone’s head off while gazing across the Mediterranean at our future European conquest?

Obama went on to specify the “none dare call it” Islamic State fanatics “are not religious leaders, they are terrorists. And we are not at war with Islam, we are at war with people who have perverted Islam.”

Red herring much? I’m probably getting way too high on my high horse here, but can the president give me a single example of any American who wants to be at war with anyone because they observe Ramadan or the Hajj?

In fact, Obama is the hawkish one in this country when it comes to being at-war with religion. It’s the First Amendment to the United States Constitution, and its protection of religious freedom, that he has in his cross-hairs. Obama sanctimoniously claims “no one should be targeted for their religious faith” while he’s targeting the Little Sisters of the Poor for theirs.

The president loathes clinging to religion only when Christianity is the faith being clung to. That’s a whole different extremism seminar, though. Back to the terrorist perverts or whatever Obama said I’m supposed to call them now.


Labels are a dicey thing. I remember a time when Leftists had a real issue with the concept of a “war on terror,” because they said it was too broad and placed insufficient rhetorical and philosophical limits on war-mongering Republicans. Now the Left sees terror ghosts everywhere, since their guy is in the captain’s chair and the “get out of war free” trump card is steeped in moral equivocation.

“Watch out,” screams Marie Harf, “here comes the global unemployed!” Given the fact we have the lowest participation in our labor force since Jimmy Carter’s malaise, I can’t imagine why an enterprising young Jihadist wouldn’t see the Obama Regime’s jobs program as a viable alternative to sipping the dogs of war.

Because, the crusades.

So to sum up, religions don’t kill people. Just like guns don’t kill people. Wait, no. Now my Leftist mantras are refuting each other. Guns definitely kill people. And Christianity needs to be less bigoted and less Christian. But religions don’t kill people. Have you thought about community college, poor foreign person, so you don’t join a certain religion that isn’t really that religion?

That’s a whole lot of crazy. Hope and change be upon you.

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