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OPINION

Observations From Covidian Twitter

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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AP Photo/Charles Krupa, File

Like a sports fan who spies on a rival team’s message boards to see what the other side is discussing, I like to scroll through what I like to call “Covidian Twitter” every so often to get the lay of the land on the latest Covid craziness. It’s usually a dystopian hellscape full of self-absorbed hypochondriacs who all think the sky is falling and they’re an unmasked breath from the brink of death or, worse, #LongCovid. It’s weird and sad and insane on every possible level. Still, it’s also immensely entertaining and insightful to see how the Covid narrative makes its way through pockets of people I avoid daily.

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Covidian Twitter isn’t for the faint of heart, but if you’d like to take a gander, look up names like Eric Feigl-Ding, Virginia Buysse, Peter Hotez, Andy Slavitt, and others in the Twitter “similar to” suggestions. You’re also guaranteed to ride the crazy train by clicking any remaining masked profiles, especially the ones with N95s covering everything but their greasy hair and beady, paranoid eyes. Good times. Of course, the wiser option might be to avoid it altogether and leave the heavy lifting to me. Hell, I’ve been pretty spot-on since March 2020, so there’s little reason to think I’d steer you wrong now, is there?

Before I go into a few observations, I’d like to caveat them by saying that even Covidian Twitter isn’t a monolith. Within the required bounds of “vaccines and masks good” and “catching Covid bad,” you’re likely to find an opposing or slightly different perspective for any particular point of view. For example, some think it’s OK to remove their mask between bites of food at an indoor dining establishment, while others still refuse to eat indoors. So, you know, completely sane, normal disagreements in 2023.

Given that, I’m not going to cite or link to names, nor will I declare a viewpoint to be the prevailing narrative definitively. I’m merely going to remark on observed trends as I see them in mid-February 2023. You might come across a different thread and observe a different trend. If so, you’re welcome to comment below or, better yet, get your column and write about it.

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With all that said, here are my most recent observations from Covidian Twitter:

There seems to be a growing resignation to the fact that the Covid vaccines wane much sooner than initially hoped. At first, of course, the hope was that one shot - or double-shot - would do the trick. That soon devolved to every year, like the flu shot. Now, the understanding seems to be that the boosters ‘last’ about 3-4 months, and someone who wants to stay ‘up to date’ is going to have to get - count ‘em - four shots every year. The more knowledgeable Covidians don’t seem to think anymore that these ‘vaccines’ prevent them from catching Covid in the first place, but they still consider they are protected from getting severely ill or dying. (The vaccinated people who do get severely sick and die from Covid? Well, they were probably going to die anyway.)

With that realization has come growing pockets of concern about the volume of the mRNA spike protein. That was surprising to me since these lemmings tend to trust Big Pharma and anything it wants to put into their bodies most of all. If anything, injecting bucketloads of mRNA spike protein into their systems should be a sacrament as holy to these people as anything a religion could provide to any of us. But, as it turns out, even Branch Covidians are noticing and pointing out uncomfortable side effects, even if they still fail to acknowledge the many deaths and permanent impairments Covid vaccines are likely responsible for (those are always just ‘coincidences,’ don’t you know). I noticed several tweets pointing out concern at this many mRNA shots and even stating how uncomfortable their last shot was because of this or that side effect they experienced. Many in this camp have expressed a desire to switch to a non-mRNA vaccine like the recently approved Novavax, and some even stated that they have already gone out of their way - even crossing state lines - to do so.

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Masking, unfortunately, but not surprisingly, maintains its revered status as an Icon of the Covidian religion. Except, while worshippers continue to insist, despite all evidence to the contrary, that any face covering is better than no face covering, the shift to at least an N95 or better as a standard of quality and protection is complete. A true Covidian won’t go indoors near people in any setting without a mask, preferably an N95. For those who want to ‘protect’ themselves as much as possible, the cadence seems to be ‘updated vaccine plus masking.’

Covidians on Twitter love hashtags like #CovidIsntOver and #LongCovid. They consistently use them to point out that the virus is still out there, waiting to strike them dead at any point or give them a lifetime of medical issues - a.k.a. #LongCovid. The latter is how they keep the fear alive among the few still willing to listen. Of course, everyone knows or seems to know that Covid has become a cold for most people. Still, if hard-core Covidians can keep the base scared of unknown weird maladies that could last a lifetime, they can keep them ‘masked and vaxxed’ in perpetuity.

Finally, despite all the measures they are still entirely in favor of, Covidians seem to be grudgingly resigning themselves to the fact that they will likely continue getting Covid over and over again in perpetuity. Still, that doesn’t keep them from strictly adhering to their religious dogma of masking and vaccines. It’s a paradox, but they don’t seem to notice or care. Through it all, like any religion, there’s an apocalyptic tenor, a sense that they would love for the virus to return in some deadly form where they are proven right, and the doubters (us) are proven wrong once and for all. 

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If any of that sounds familiar, remember, it’s a religion.

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