In my January 1, 2024, column entitled “Top Twenty Terrible Predictions for 2024,” I noted that, “Every year, I offer you my predictions for the coming trip around the Sun, and every year, I’m mostly wrong.” Back then, I predicted that “I think [2024] will be a disaster.” Shows what I know. Personally, I had two houses flood from broken plumbing and practically became a general contractor. That sucked. But in the macro, it was a pretty good year for America.
I predicted that “Trump is not going to be subject to any federal trials this year…. The state cases might, but they are idiotic too.” I also predicted that “the 14th Amendment nonsense is going to get shot down. I thought Hunter would plead out. As expected, Joe Biden was “not held accountable for his crimes.”
Then there was this: “I really like Ron DeSantis, but there’s a significant chance that Donald Trump is going to be the nominee.” Oh, but then I ruined it by predicting that “if he is the nominee, he picks Nikki Haley and, for reasons I will set out in an upcoming Townhall column, that’s a good idea…from his perspective.” Boy, did that column stir the pot! I also correctly predicted that “she’ll continue to spew consultant-generated corporate-friendly cliches and hack talking points as she seeks to turn back the clock on Republicanism twenty years.”
I predicted that “Israel is going to rout Hamas,” but also that “there will be some sort of talks to resolve the Ukraine open wound.” I was right that “the Houthis will continue to humiliate America and will be on the receiving end of a few puny airstrikes.” At home, I foresaw leftist riots. Those did not happen. I predicted that “the border crisis will continue unabated,” and Biden pretended to abate it a little bit. I also correctly saw that “the GOP squish caucus will enter into a compromise to solve it.” Senator Jim Amnesty Lankford makes an appearance in my “Biggest Idiots of 2024” column.
I was right that we would win the Senate but wrong when I predicted that “we will lose the House because we are Republicans and Republicans are stupid.” In fact, we won it, barely, because Republicans are stupid. I was wrong when I predicted a Supreme Court vacancy to be filled by “a pinko BIPOC differently-abled nonbinary two-spirit of heft.”
I was right when I predicted that wokeness would peak and begin to decline. I was right that “the women’s Olympic medals will all be won by men, proving that men are better than women at everything, including being women.” I was also right that “the Regime Media will suffer more layoffs and bankruptcies, and there will be much rejoicing.” I expected the football guy to dump Taylor Swift. I don’t know whether that happened or not.
I was doing pretty well until I got here: “Joe Biden is not going to be replaced, and he will be on the ballot in November. I’m not sure if he’ll know it, though. Man, picking Kamala Harris was the greatest insurance policy anybody ever took out.” I further opined that “the Democrats will win in November.” In my defense, I said that hoping “my track record of being wrong about my predictions holds up.” It held up, thankfully.
Here’s what I think will happen in 2025:
The Senate will confirm almost all of Trump’s nominees because the Senate Republicans will, amazingly, choose not to be stupid.
The House Republicans will choose to be stupid, predictably. They will fight over the speakership and eventually settle on Speaker Johnson. He will then screw up the reconciliation process. Half of the GOP caucus will want the status quo and will not compromise, and half will not want the status quo and will not compromise. Also, random deaths, arrests, and betrayals will mean the majority is always precarious. I expect to barely keep it.
The tech overlords will get past the visa fight but grow frustrated at the resistance to DOGE’s campaign. There is a chance they will depart from their temporary coalition with the GOP.
The economy will boom under Trump, as in the eighties under Reagan. Sadly, our new music will not be similarly awesome.
The Houthis will learn about war the hard way when we stop taking guff from these desert dorks under President Trump.
China will not invade Taiwan because they are scared of Trump. They will keep building up forces though.
Trump will end the war in Ukraine, or at least stop the fighting and replace it with a Slavic mini-Cold War. That beats the current bloodbath. No one will be happy about it except those of us sick of the butchery.
Israel will end the war in Gaza by killing all those semi-human terrorist slugs. But the hostages will be mostly murdered.
Iran’s mullahs will behave or die. Personally, I prefer option two.
Canada will not become our 51st state, but Castro’s dumb son will get tossed out. We won’t buy Greenland; frankly, we should just take it.
SCOTUS will remind the lower courts that it means what it said about there being a right to keep and bear arms that shall not be infringed.
Joni Ernst and/or Thom Tillis will face a serious primary.
A bunch of soft Republicans will try yet another amnesty ploy labeled as “comprehensive immigration reform.” This means they will try to screw over the American First people. They will fail.
JD Vance will become Trump’s go-to Mr. Fix-it. He will not get Kamala’d into the background. The regime media will try to drive a wedge between him and Trump, who will compromise to get what he really wants. This will fail.
Kamala Harris will not run for California governor. Her fellow Democrats will treat her like a herpetic incel.
Joe Biden will disappear from public view. His decline will accelerate. There will be many tell-all books on his dementia and the regime media will decide that they need to make up for giving him a pass by lying about Trump twice as hard.
Trump will pardon most every J6 defendant. The establishment will cry about it, but after Hunter, the murderers and the Chinese perverts Crusty pardoned, no one will care.
Pete Hegseth will lead the military to much improved readiness and recruiting numbers, and his purge of the deadwood will be welcomed by all true patriots.
Scott Jennings will ditch CNN for a primetime Fox show.
There will be a “People’s Republic”/Kelly Turnbull graphic novel, and maybe even a movie/series deal after some right-wing billionaires figure out that winning in the pop culture arena has more impact than funding yet another white paper on regulatory reform written by a bow-tied nerd at the American Forum for Liberty, Eagles, Families, and Forums.
Once again, see you in 12 months, assuming these idiots have not caused a nuclear and/or civil war in the meantime so that I can give you some more inevitably wrong predictions for 2026.
Donald Trump will be the 47th President of the United States in just a few weeks, but our fight to make America great again is only just beginning, and we need your help to keep telling the truth! Join Townhall VIP right now to get access to my extra Wednesday column, the weekly Stream of Kurtiousness videos every Friday, my Unredacted podcast every Monday, my VIP members-only direct email address, and more! Use promo code FIGHT for 60% off a membership!
Follow Kurt on Twitter @KurtSchlichter. Get the newest volume in the Kelly Turnbull People’s Republic series of conservative action novels set in America after a notional national divorce, the bestselling Amazon #1 Military Thriller, Overlord! And get his new novel about terrorism in America, The Attack!
Join the conversation as a VIP Member