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A Politically Incorrect Prayer

Democrats Get Mad At the Russians; In Other News, a Dog Marries a Cat

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.

I guess we should be excited that liberals and the media have finally sided against the Russians. After all, my college years were spent listening to them demand that we unilaterally disarm in the face of the Big Bad Bear. And then my post college years were spent in West Germany with the mission of killing Russians for as long as I could before my platoon and I were wiped out. Later, I helped train Ukrainians. So welcome to the party, you pinko dorks. It’s about freaking time.


But apparently now me and a bunch of other certified Cold Warriors – yeah, the Army gave me a certificate for perfect attendance in the Cold War – are Putin’s pals because we are enjoying the hell out of the strongman’s perfectly timed disclosure of the DNC’s purloined emails. They make undeniable what we always knew, and what the Democrat-owned media has tried desperately to hide; that the Democratic Party is not a political party but a crime cartel peddling lies, trading influence for dollars, and crushing the aspirations of anyone stupid enough to actually believe in it.

Of course, the DNC’s reaction to revelations was not to change its ways. No, all it did was dump that babbling half-wit Debbie Wasserman Schultz, a sacrifice akin to giving up Spam and Clamato smoothies for Lent.

The reaction of the Democrats and the suddenly-not-Walter Duranty media was classic. Like a teen confronting her dad who is holding the baggie of weed he found in her nightstand, the DNC cried “OMG, I can’t believe you went through my stuff!” before throwing herself sobbing on her bed at the unfairness of it all.

And it’s hard not to ROTFLMAO when Clinton media stooges cite anonymous FBI sources intoning that it’s clearly Putin and he clearly wants to influence the election in favor of Donald Trump. This is the same FBI that couldn’t figure out how to pin a crime on the manifestly guilty Hillary and which shrugs, “Gee, we have no idea about his motive” every time some Muslim radical shouts “Allahu akbar” and goes on a shooting spree.


Did Putin do it? I bet he did, but then I was never stupid or dishonest enough to claim (unlike the whiny libs who are now having a collective emotional spazzout) that Wikileaks and Snowden and the rest were anything but neo-Soviet fronts using classic disinformation tactics spiffed up for the digital age. And Dems, cry me a river about your sudden reluctance to have the Bear do what bears do in the woods all over Hillary’s election chances. Your hero Teddy Kennedy pioneered unnatural acts of bear lovin’ when he wasn’t busy leaving girls to drown in his car.

So why did Putin do it? Who knows? It night be chaos – the ex-KGB spy sure loves chaos. Or he might really prefer Donald Trump being president over Hillary Clinton. Still, the notion that he “owns” Trump because Trump’s companies did deals with Russian companies are simply silly. Clinton Incorporated does business with Russians too. And Trump’s ability to turn on a dime when an ally stops being useful is legendary – just ask Trump’s good friend Ted Cruz. So if Putin is trying to buy himself a pal by forcing Trump on America by exposing the Democrats’ massive corruption, well, that’s an iffy bet.

Does Putin want to avoid four years of dealing with President Felonia Milhous von Pantsuit? Why would he want to do that when it’s absolutely certain he’s sitting on the contents of her email servers, including the good stuff the FBI refused to charge her with obstruction of justice for deleting? Still, it’s hard to imagine him resisting throwing that gasoline on the fire. I eagerly await the FSB dropping it right at the moment they can cause that hideous monster the most damage. And no, “Putin doesn’t like her” doesn’t compel anyone to vote for an aspiring fascist who wants to make it possible to jail those who criticize her, limit our right to practice our religion to those acts of devotion that don’t interfere with her progressive desires, and disarm us in the face of the criminals she excuses while rendering us unable to defend ourselves from her ambitions. Oppose Putin? He’s her role model.


Now there is a serious problem with Donald Trump, and that’s his comments about NATO. Deterrence works because our opponents believe we will keep our word and fight. Trump did not say we would never fight as we promised, but he left a whiff of doubt. And that’s undeniably bad.

Now, Obama has been shafting allies for eight years, with Clinton by his side for half of them, but Trump’s comments about not honoring our Article 5 commitments are still terrible. He needs to walk them back and make clear that an attack on Estonia, Poland, or wherever means war with the U.S. – to the extent the Obama-shrunken military can still fight a conventional war. And when he’s elected, the prissy conservative foreign policy establishment that’s boycotted him for having cooties needs to cut out their whiny posturing and get into the administration and square it away.

But if you want to save NATO, make no mistake that what Trump is saying resonates with millions of Americans – including vets. Many NATO countries have, amazingly, let their militaries whither even worse than ours. They are not keeping their promise by paying their fair share, and many Americans ask themselves why the hell our blood and treasure should be on the line if the Europeans are not all in too. Many of our NATO allies talked a good game about helping us in Afghanistan, but we know some of them (certainly not all) offered only miserly contributions of troops who were largely penned up with rules of engagement that made them close to useless. Until all of our allies step up and match our contribution, Trump is going to speak for many Americans outside the Beltway bubble when he tells our half-stepping allies that they need to carry their own rucks.


No, Trump should not have drawn the line the way he did, but this NATO-on-the-cheap nonsense has been going on for decades. Pearl clutching foreign policy guys, what is your solution to solving this problem? Asking nicely has not seemed to work, and if our allies don’t start getting serious, then NATO really will be done for.

As for Hillary, do we really want an unstable sociopath with a history of both vindictiveness and a demonstrated willingness to commit military forces to unwise and arguably illegal military adventures playing out her personal revenge fantasies against Putin with the lives of our young warriors? No thanks – there are lots of things worth dying for, but Hillary’s hurt feelings about the disclosure of emails that never should have been on her toilet server is not one of them.

At the end of my career, as Putin was growing more and more uppity, some of us grizzled colonels and sergeants major sat around with our young captains and majors, reminding them that we still had a few tricks up our camo sleeves. You see, while these amazing young warriors knew everything there was to know about chasing insurgents, there was something us old warhorses knew how to do that they didn’t. We knew how to kill Russians. If I didn’t need a Russia Is Not Our Pal 101 seminar from those young studs, I sure as hell don’t need it from a bunch of fellow traveling progressive schmucks who have been kissing bear tail since Stalin grew a moustache.


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