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OPINION

The Liberal Strategy for 2014: Buffoonery

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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Government economists revised upwards their GDP estimates for the fourth quarter of 2013. And guess what?

We did much better than anybody thought possible!

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The Commerce Department revised GDP upwards to 2.6% growth from the 2.4% growth that they had previously estimated for the fourth quarter.

So while everybody was bemoaning the fact that the Christmas shopping numbers that came out in December were adversely affected by weather, it's clear now to government economists that the effects of fourth quarter weather were put off until the first quarter of 2014.

Or something.

“Robust consumer spending on services,” says Bloomberg, “particularly health care, helped accelerate the expansion, a sign that this year’s slowdown is partly due to heavy snowfall and freezing temperatures. Retailers such as Macy’s Inc. are waiting for the weather to improve to get a clearer picture of the economy.”

Gee, I wonder what could have precipitated such robust spending for health care in the fourth quarter of 2013?

Ah, yes: That was the quarter in which the Obama administration chose to screw everybody by having their insurance premiums go up.

Their only regret, now, is that they didn't have premiums go higher. Think of all the GDP growth we’re missing out on because of that.

Stupid Democrats.

Now, if we could only get the ossified Republicans to hike the minimum wage to $4 million an hour, everyone would be rich.

This is important.

Why?

Because if everyone were rich it would justify the Democrats disdain for people, including, by the way, themselves.

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It would also help bring about the liberals’ long-desired goal of making everybody poor, once they taxed them.

You know what they say: "The Poor the Merrier.”

Which leads me to this question for my liberal friends: At what point do liberals get tired of defending bad policy, poor implementation and sloppy intellectualism when the only weapon, it seems, that their Democrat leaders have is buffoonery?

“Affordable. Affordable,” said Madame Pelosi just a week ago. “There’s a reason. Affordable. Affordable. Affordable. Affordable. Affordable. The reason they changed the name of it is because they wanted to get away, they — the opponents — from the word ‘affordable.’ And that’s why I’m patient with some of these comments. Whatever it is, it’s infinitely more affordable than the path that we were on.”

According to the tables provided by the Commerce Department's Bureau of economic analysis, health care expenditures accounted for almost 40% of the personal consumption increase.

That's some affordability. Affordable. Affordable. Affordable.

If the rest us labeled our product more "affordable" while hiking prices, we'd get a visit from the Department of Justice. Late night pitchman, Kevin Trudeau, got ten years in jail for making "false" statements in a diet book.

Yeah: A diet book.

Cuz diet books are sooo trustworthy.

"I just didn’t realize false advertising was still a crime," said my colleague Rusty Humphries on the Washington Times web site. "Look at Obamacare! Everything the president said about it was false advertising."

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So while economists trumpet the fact that consumer spending is up, the plurality of the spending is coming from increased health care costs.

Affordable. Affordable. Affordable.

Maybe that’s why Obama is extending the Obamacare enrollment period.

"Under the new rules,” reports the Post, “people will be able to qualify for an extension by checking a blue box on HealthCare.gov to indicate that they tried to enroll before the deadline. This method will rely on an honor system; the government will not try to determine whether the person is telling the truth.”

They’re hoping the rest of us will extend them the same courtesy truth-wise.

And unfortunately, on issue after issue, including the government fabrication of economic numbers, we have.

A Great Society we’ve built here under Obama: The government lies to us; and expects us to be dishonest right back.

This ought to end real well.

Buffoonery in government usually does.

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