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OPINION

Rise of the Zeta Males

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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There’s a possibility our species will, in the not-too-distant future, be wiped out. Not by a meteor, but by simply no longer reproducing. Sterility won’t be the culprit, it will be the rise of the zeta males.

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You doubtlessly have heard of alpha and beta males – alphas being dominant and aggressive, and betas being pajama wearing, vegans with man-buns. While it may seem like those two options represent the bookends of the scale, there is a new, disturbing option emerging that may, and maybe should, mean the end of all human reproduction: the zeta male.

The zeta male is so far down the scale from the beta male so as to make them look like the bastard child of a steroid-fueled spawning session between Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger, man-bun and all.

So, what is a zeta male? They aren’t just “woke” feminists, thought they are certainly that. They are biological men for whom a urinal holds no meaning, they always sit. They get tattoos of Hillary Clinton and attend Brony conventions.

More than that, they are exemplified by a recent op-ed in the Harvard Crimson, the student newspaper of America’s most over-priced college.

The piece, entitled, “The Harvard Community is Responsible for Sexual Assault,” is a progressive diary entry on the fall of western civilization.

The headline is typical leftist pap – blaming everyone for the actions of a few so as to alleviate personal guilt. But the source of the personal guilt in this case is the issue and the evidence.

The author (who I won’t name because he’s a young kid and had to have been made this way by liberals in his life as a child) is haunted by something he did with two friends over a year ago; haunted to the point that he felt compelled to confess his sin not to a priest, but to everyone on campus.

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So what was this horrible offense; this sexist, sexual assault enabling action he took? He acted like a normal guy, quite possibly for the first and only time in his life.

How? I’ll let him explain:

“During Orientation Week in August of 2016, I was out late drinking in Harvard Square with two classmates. The topic switched to the women in our class. Over the drunken hum of the bar’s collective conversation, one guy proposed the ‘hottest’ girls in our class. The other did the same. They both then asked me to rank the girls in our cohort in the order I wanted to get with. My alarmed heart bolted blood to my cheeks. I crossed my arms, unable to speak. ‘Are we making you uncomfortable?’ one asked me. I cannot remember my exact response. But it was not: ‘Yes. Objectifying women, even though it seems harmless to you, demeans them and creates an environment that makes sexual assault more likely.’ Instead, I uncrossed my arms, I shook my head, and yes, I discussed which girls were hot.”

We no longer have a need for The Onion, real life has become a parody of itself.

All they were basically doing is talking about the women they find attractive, something every normal, healthy, heterosexual man since communication was invented has been doing, but now it’s just one step down from Harvey Weinstein. Maybe only a half-step.

This is as insane as it is hilarious, a eunuch’s love letter to a lonely future.

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The zeta continued, “At the time, it was easy for me to discard my act of cowardice as inconsequential. The desire to be included made the risk of speaking up too great. During many similar ‘inconsequential’ comments at the pub and locker rooms throughout my life, I know I’ve taken the easy way out.”

I didn’t realize competitive knitting had locker rooms.

The confession of this student (a graduate student, no less) is a prime example of what happens when you accept as moral arbiters people who insist gender is a social construct and a person can switch from one to the other at will.

Men finding women attractive, and vice versa, is why we’re all here. Talking about it, and everything else, with friends, even in crude terms, is perfectly normal human behavior. But now it’s pre-rape and needs to be confessed.

We’re not going to survive as a species if the zeta male mentality metastasizes beyond college campuses and a political fringe…and maybe we wouldn’t deserve to.

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