Doug Giles

Last Friday afternoon the president injected himself into the Trayvon/Zimmerman mix again by doing what he excels at, namely, increasing the racial divide, blaming the “white Hispanic,” condemning guns and upbraiding essentially everyone but the stoned and violent truant named, Trayvon.

Look, I don’t fault Obama for stirring the Trayvon pot again. Hell, I would have if I were in his shoes. “Why,” you ask? Well, it’s pretty simple folks: it takes everyone’s attention off the Mama June-sized scandals he’s boiling in right now, that’s why.

Of course he’s going to milk this cow. He doesn’t want us yapping about the ubiquitous outrages he’s enmeshed in; such as the IRS, NSA, DOJ, Benghazi, bankrupt Detroit or how much ObamaCare is hated and sucks. I’m really surprised he didn’t blow up a Sudanese aspirin factory yesterday and I guarantee he’s got Axlerod and Oliver Stone in a joint effort to "fabricate" a quick war next week in order to further cover his scandal-addled backside. I hear Dustin Hoffman is slated to reprise his 1997 role in Wag the Dog.

It’s called diversion folks. I used to do it all the time when I was in trouble as a child.

I’ll never forget this one time in the 8th grade when I mouthed off to a rather Rubenesque chick. She didn’t particularly like my quip and forthrightly said that she was, “going to kick my ass.” I said, “You can’t kick my ass,” and she said, “Yes I can and I will kick your ass today, after school.”

By the look in her eye I knew this massive Amazonian volleyball wench was serious, and more than likely, if I didn’t do something quick, I was screwed because at that juncture I probably weighed 100lbs-soaking wet and did not know martial arts.

I’m sitting there thinking, “What’s a young, skinny, smart ass to do?” That’s when Todd came walking up to us and I said, “Hey, Todd. Deanna thinks she’s tough. Hey, Deanna, I bet you can’t kick Todd’s ass.” Deanna said, “I can kick his ass,” to which Todd said, “No you can’t.” Mission accomplished. It was at that point that I had stealthily extracted myself from that equation. Yes, I had successfully averted attention away from me to Todd.

Oh, by the way – she destroyed Todd. It was brutal. She yanked half of his hair off of his head. I can still see the blonde strands from Todd’s bleeding noggin wafting in the west Texas breeze. She also yanked his pants down and as he was trying to pull them up she devastated him with a Tyson-like upper cut and finished him Frazieresque left hook. It. Was. Brutal. I was sitting there thinking, as I watched that epic beat down, “Garsh, that could have been me.”

Doug Giles

Doug Giles is the Big Dawg at and the Co-Owner of The Safari Cigar Company. Follow him onFacebook and Twitter. And check out his new book, Rise, Kill and Eat: A Theology of Hunting from Genesis to Revelation.