Deet deet deet deet...breaking news....breaking news...this is your reality check live from the United Nations General Assembly in New York City. I know it sounds like a lot is going on here, but that's not really true. All these world "leaders" will forget about all of these "issues" when they leave here in a rubber chicken fugue. Allow me to fill you in on the essential so far.

UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown won the UN Statesmanship Award, which probably was meant to go to Libya's Gaddafi, except that he was too busy building his tent-city on Donald Trump's lawn in suburban NY. Trump loaned his property to some Middle Eastern friends, who then turned it over to Ghaddafi, who turned it into a refugee camp. So among this fine crowd, the award went to Brown, who apparently best exemplified the perrenial UN values of scandal and ineptitude.

Former UK PM Tony Blair's spinmeister, Alastair Campbell, complained on his blog that the media was ignoring the news of Brown's award. I appreciate what Campbell does from a humanitarian perspective as a fellow advocate for people who cannot speak honestly for themselves because they bear the burden of elected office, but i think he may be overlooking that the media may simply be practicing what their mums preached: If you can't say anything at nice, don't say anything at all. I personally have no problem talking about Gordon Brown's accolade - so i hope this satisfies Mr. Campbell.

In other news, Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper, reportedly skipped the entire "Climate Day" general session and showed up in time for dinner. I teared up when i heard this. I can't remember the last time i felt so proud to be a Canadian. And seeing that Harper is headed for a possible majority in the upcoming federal election, it would seem that I'm part of a silent majority.

I wonder which third world country is currently being stomped to death by the enormous carbon footprint all these people are creating in coming together to save the world? Have they not heard of Skype? Or is that just for the little people?

Now please pardon me while I fend off advances from a French delegate who will probably have trouble following through on his lovely offer to "wine and dine".