Her first week was difficult. She worried about the new doctors I'd line up, fearing I might insist on going into the exam with her (of course, I didn't) or that they would tell her she needed to eat differently or make friends her own age, advice she'd ignored for years. But once she realized I'd let her buy her Milky Ways and shortbread cookies and wouldn't try to interest her in the local senior center, she settled in nicely.

The key has been allowing her the independence she so values. Yes, she is dependent on me for driving her on errands, but she wants to prepare her own meals and set her own schedule. She's invited to join us in family events -- grandkids' and great-grandkids' birthdays, Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations -- but she's also free to retreat to her apartment when it gets too noisy or decline the invitation if it involves a long car ride or she's not feeling up to it.

Most days she spends lying on the couch in her sitting room listening to the Game Show Network or Fox News Channel. She keeps the shades down and the TV volume and heat up. She eats like a bird, taking only tiny portions of meat or vegetables, but she always has room for dessert. Her main exercise is pushing the cart through the grocery store once a week. But she remains trim and still beautiful after all these years -- and more important, happy.

I can't possibly know how long we'll have her with us or what new challenges the years ahead with her will bring. But I do know that bringing her to live with me was the right decision. In an age when the elderly are often seen more as a burden than a benefit, it is important to remember what our parents have done for us and what we owe them. Taking care of each other is what family is all about.