Hire Me

Mary Katharine Ham
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Posted: Oct 23, 2006 9:44 AM

Cover letters from Hell:

The mistakes ranged from unfortunate omissions ("I am seeking a new position as i have recently been laid" and "I also have a degree English which serves me well in editing text for poor grammer or typos") to nonsense sentences and topics ("It is through the innovational process, as well as media, that the features of an image can be highlighted and brought to the forefront for the consumer viewing" or "The colors red, blue, and lavender are those that I identify with the most. I feel they accurately describe my personality. I choose red because I turn red when I get embarrassed …").

Some candidates even try their hand at poetry — one girl rewrote "'T'was the Night Before Christmas," editing herself and the advertising company into the story and substituting presents for a job.