What Kamala Harris Posted Shows She Doesn't Care About Hurricane Helene Victims
There Was an Attempted Self-Immolation Incident at the White House. Man Is Allegedly...
Kamala Harris Is Playing 'Pretend President' Already And She’s Horrible At It
In Times of Crisis, Ron DeSantis Shows What True Leadership Looks Like
Jonathan Roumie Interview: Jesus Actor from ‘The Chosen’ About His New Film ‘Heart...
Arizona Is in Danger of Turning Into California
Stand With Steel Laborers, Not Union Bosses: Trump’s Path to the Union Vote
Is There a Problem? Legalized Murder Is the Harris Solution
A Tribute to America, My Family and a Dear Friend and Mentor
Thoughts on the Israel/Palestine Conflict
October 7, 9/11 and the Mystery of Evil
Why Republicans Want a Border Wall and Democrats Do Not
The Cheneys' Endorsement of Harris Should Be a Wake-Up Call to Vote for...
'So, As I Was Saying:' Trump Takes the Stage for the Second Time...
JD Vance Tears Into Biden-Harris Admin During Butler, PA Rally
OPINION

(Capitalist) Pigs...in...Spaaaace!

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

If there's one thing that defines the Biden administration and the modern Democratic Party (and the modern Republican Party too, but who's counting?), it's this: throwing money in all directions. Since it's not their money, but your money, you can see why this strategy would be appealing. It purchases our valiant politicians' goodwill, either from valuable constituencies rich with voting power, but poor in, uhh, money, or from super-rich donors, whose chief goal in life is to get considerably richer at taxpayer expense. In other words, when the pork starts to flow, everyone's a winner – except the downtrodden middle class, but who cares about them?

Advertisement

A case in point: the U.S. Senate, in its infinite patrician wisdom, is considering a subtle change to the National Defense Authorization Act (usually known as the NDAA). The purpose of this ever-so-minor tweak, which is opposed by the Air Force and the Space Force, is apparently to expand the list of companies eligible to supply launch vehicles for highly-sensitive military missions. The military says the optimal number of private companies that should be involved in sending our most super-secret and critical payloads into space is two. The Senate is inclined to believe that it ought to be three instead. Now why, you ask, would our esteemed elected representatives second-guess the experts in the military itself, especially when doing so would cost, according to the Space Force, something like an extra $5 billion? Curious, no? It doesn't seem to add up...

And yet it does – politically, if not fiscally. The company that would almost surely benefit from this change in the NDAA is called “Blue Origin”, which just happens to be owned, solely and completely, by an obscure fellow named...Jeff Bezos.

Now, you may have heard of old Jeff. He's the bald guy who lost $38 billion in a nasty divorce back in 2019, and today scrapes by on a mere $154 billion fortune. Ouch! He also founded a little company called “Amazon” that you may or may not have done business with...in the last hour (and which sustains its domination of e-commerce by soliciting massive tax breaks and subsidies). Rounding out his C.V. would be ownership of a rag called The Washington Post, which apparently carries quite a bit of weight in the world of (what now passes for) print journalism. Long story short: Jeff is doing pretty well for himself!

Advertisement

Given Jeff's status as the world's third richest man, given his past generosity in terms of political contributions, and given his considerable influence over the media, it only makes sense that the venerable statesmen in the Senate would want to throw several billion dollars in the general direction of his own personal rocket company. Not only does Jeff love money, but he also loves space, and it would truly tickle his fancy to be awarded major contracts by both the U.S. military and NASA to underwrite his sci-fi fantasies, including the (repeatedly delayed and technically dubious) heavy-lift “New Glenn” rocket program.

I know what you're thinking: can we, as a country, afford to spend money unnecessarily on over-sized rockets, merely to stroke the ego of a megarich megadonor? Heck, we haven't run out of money yet, have we? Have we? No, as of this moment, we haven't, although interest rates have doubled because of government profligacy, but, as yet, the politicians haven't suffered for it, so everything is under control.

Ergo, let me be the first to congratulate Jeff Bezos on his additional billions! I suppose there's a chance – just a small one – that cooler heads might prevail in the Senate, or even more likely in the House, but, given the way that Washington works, I like old Jeff's chances of cashing in one more time on big government's abject stupidity.

Advertisement

Assuming everything works out for Jeff and his over-priced roman candle, I plan to show up to the inaugural launch of “New Glenn” (realistically, in 2082?) wearing a t-shirt that says: “my elected representatives gave Jeff Bezos $5 billion (and counting), and all I got was this lousy rocket!” 

You think I'll get my picture in The Washington Post

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Townhall Videos