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Democrats Are Facing Annihilation in 2022, Which Is Nice

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AP Photo/John Minchillo

The polls are in and, well, the Democrats are looking at not just a wave in the midterms but a red tsunami. Biden is awful, Harris is awful squared, the Republican generic ballot is an unprecedented R+10. For perspective, if the generic ballot is even, the GOP cleans house, literally. All the Republicans have to do is not blow it, which is kind of like hoping Biden gives a press conference and doesn’t say anything stupid. So, it’s white-knuckle time for us too.

Kamala is getting thrown to the wolves. I assume she will respond by trying to move up in the lupine power structure by seeking to date the leader of the pack.

In Texas, noted furry and electoral loser Beto O’Rourke is back. Now he wants to make a losing run for governor on a platform of Biden-backing, gun-grabbing, and dressing like a cartoon animal for erotic thrills. In the Lone Star State, at least two of those positions guarantee defeat.

Apocalypse 2022

You might almost pity the Democrats when you see their disastrous polling numbers. Almost. There are more popular STDs out there than these guys, and they really have no good options for turning things around. How they would turn it around is obvious – ditch their kooky reconciliation bill, let American energy producers do their thing, stop letting foreign potentates humiliate us, enforce the border, and lock Biden in a closet with a TV and a shawl.

The problem is that the Democrats can’t do any of these things. The bad things happening now, like inflation and a busted supply chain and America looking weak, are not side effects or collateral damage. Rather, they are the results progressives sought. They want $7 gas, because that means you peasants will drive your wicked Chevy Tahoes less and thereby appease the angry weather goddess they worship. They want empty store shelves, because you Americans are bad people and you don’t deserve prosperity or the ability to buy what you want when you want. And they want America ashamed and impotent, much like a Bulwark staff writer.

Whoever is running the Biden White House has to balance the communists in the Democrat Party with the communist lites in the Democrat party. The solution is obvious, but the solution is the one thing that the Biden Regime cannot do.

This is not going to get better. There was some chatter this weekend that the administration is taking comfort from the idea that they can’t fall any lower. And it looks like their answer to that is “Challenge accepted!”

But, of course, there is a catch. The Republicans have to not whiff. McConnell, McCarthy, and Trump, all need to not blow this. The rank-and-file need not to blow it – hey dudes, hold off on your perversions and corruption for a dozen months and let us get through this, okay? Relying on the Democrats to screw up is risky, but relying on the Republicans not to screw up is even riskier.

Everyone Hates Kamala

You may not have noticed, but we have a vice-president. What she does, besides channel Selina Meyer in Veep, is apparently nothing. Usually, the presidential understudy is relegated to tasks like attending the funerals of second tier dictators and wandering aimlessly through the executive office building. In Kamala’s case, she also has to do her President of the Senate thing and break ties in cases where Joe Manchin gets what he wants and Schumer can rustle up 50 votes. 

But she gets to do nothing else. This is because Biden’s handlers have correctly identified her as a liability. It’s telling that the desiccated old pervert’s first big decision – choosing a running mate – was a total disaster. In the business, we call that a “harbinger.” She got dusted in the primaries, but she has some big plusses. She has lots of influential friends – she is famously friendly to the influential – and she checks some diversity boxes. She has a big handicap too – she’s an insincere clown with zero talent, so there’s that.

White House intrigue is pretty common, and staffs snipe at each other (though these guys are pikers compared to staff sniping among military staffs). But here, there may be more than the usual jockeying for position. Harris’s polling is even worse than Grandpa Badfinger’s dismal numbers, if that’s possible, at a terrifying 28% approval. The terrifying part is two-fold – for the Biden clique, it’s clear she’s a leprous albatross, and for America it’s terrifying that 28% of the voters approve of her. 

This means she’s the obvious scapegoat – the idea being that President * would be doing great without the cackling anchor that is his veep. She was supposed to manage the border, and that’s gone poorly. She should have been whatever the infrastructure czar is, but they choose someone else. There’s a vote o’ confidence! She contributes nothing except odd gaffes, like talking to the frogs in a Pepe Le Pew accent for no apparent reason.

She’s terrible to be sure, but there’s no evidence that her terribleness is causing or even exacerbating The Asterisk’s terribleness. Biden’s puppetmasters are looking for an excuse, and being the excuse is one job Kamala can do.

Beto Is Back!

The nickname “Beto” lends itself to puns about onanism, but so does his latest run for office. He famously lost to Ted Cruz in an off-GOP year. Now he wants to take on Greg Abbott in a GOP-on year. This is the Jeffrey Toobin Zoom call of political campaigns.

He’s funded by rich people from out of state who think because he wears a jeans jacket that he’s some sort of authentic cowpoke, and that the suckers with trucks and rifles will as eagerly swoon for him as the wine women of Marin County do. We should encourage this delusion. If the Democrats want to set fire to piles of money that might swing a swing district race, we should be right there handing them the gas can.

Beto 2024! Justice for Furry-Americans!

Things are looking good today, but things could still go bad tomorrow. My sixth Kelly Turnbull conservative action thriller, The Split, shows what happens when America splits into red and blue countries. Get all six bestsellers, including People's Republic, Indian Country, Wildfire, Collapse, and Crisis!

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