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OPINION

Never Hire Anyone Who Looks Like They’d Be a Lawsuit to Fire

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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While I believe social media is, over all, a cancer on society, it does serve some invaluable purposes for people willing to look for them. One, possibly the biggest, is it leads a lot of leftist weirdos to show the world exactly who and what they are. Radical racists, anti-American militants and attention-whoring gender mutants all feel compelled to film themselves saying things that used to be met with an ass-kicking. But social media has also given normal people the exact tool they need to avoid having any interactions with these people, and we should be grateful for that.

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I have been hired and fired more times than most families, having had over 77 jobs (that I can remember) in my life. Most were short-term engagements, as you might imagine with that number – I worked in the world headquarters of a major floral company for a week (my driving record wouldn’t let me get insured to drive the mail van) and was a “Merry Maid” for an hour, only watching the training video and realizing the job, as desperately as I needed one at the time, was not for me. You name it, I’ve done it. And much of it, especially early on, I did with a horrible attitude about my bosses, my co-workers and the customers. Pretty much everyone and everything you’d interact with…I was terrible.

What I wasn’t was difficult to get rid of. They’d just fire me. I took it well. After a few times, I’d become an expert at being fired. It was the part of most of these jobs I was best at, if I’m being honest. At this point in life, I can barely imagine how I was able to get fired from concrete work after a week or making sandwiches in an office building deli, but I deserved all of it.

What I never did was publicly declare myself to be against, and therefore subverting, the company I was working for. I never felt compelled to tell the world about my sexual escapades or talk to children about drunken adventures.

Thank God the Internet didn’t exist and cell phones were wildly expensive and didn’t have cameras. Though I doubt, even in my younger, dumber time, I would have engaged in the stupidity we see now – I was dumb, but these people seem beyond stupid to the point that they get confused by Velcro. I mostly didn’t care about anything, these weirdos care desperately about everything. 

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The current crop of crybabies are ready to be victims; they crave it. They are the mental equivalent of Meghan and Harry – telling every camera they can run up to about how they just want to be left alone without recognizing the irony. 

Anyone with enough time to make up some dumbass word they insist passes as a “pronoun” simply because they’ve added “self” to it is worth avoiding. And while the general state of unattractiveness, neck and face tattoos and so many piercings in their head that passing through airport security requires an extra hour of prep work are all dead giveaways, there’s nothing like a confession. And social media seems to have all these people recording and posting videos of themselves professing things that demonstrate the need to keep them outside of several football fields distance from a school. Any school, even an obedience school.

I’m not comparing these people to dogs, I like dogs. I’m encouraging anyone with any role in hiring people to scour the Internet for any clue a potential hire ever posted videos about the virtues of a “throuple” or how some evil person referred to them as “she” because, well, she’s a she. If you find anything remotely close to something that could share a category with the above, set their resume on fire. 

A good rule of thumb for hiring is never even consider hiring someone who you suspect it would be a lawsuit to fire. They weren’t always so easy to spot – the people who’d remind you whatever you asked them to do “Is not in my job description” – but now it is; they lay it out there for the world to see. They’re proud of it. And you should be happy for it.

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No one will ever tell you they’re crazy and won’t work hard in a job interview, they wait to show you that until after they’ve gotten the job. Now they scream it to the world to see because it’s a status symbol with the left. When someone tells you who they are, believe them. And, for the love of God, do not hire them.

 

Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!) and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses, and host of the weekly “Week in F*cking Review” podcast where the news is spoken about the way it deserves to be. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter.

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