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OPINION
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Kamala's Interview of Meteoric Mediocrity, Vance's Vile Jokes, and Walz Takes Over Biden's Ice Cream Beat

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Reporting on the Mirror – CNN

  • The choices for this category were remarkably narrow.

Okay, look – it is CNN, so of course it touted its own interview with Kamala Harris. That was a given. And technically, it was also accurate in declaring this as the “clearest view yet” of her agenda – given this was THE ONLY sit-down interview she has given in well over a month since taking the nomination of her party. The truncated and edited 16-minute interview was hardly a landmark moment in politics.

That established, maybe suggesting it was the “clearest” was a misstep. We note that when given a rather direct question posed by Dana Bash about what she would do her first day in office, Harris went off on a meandering answer about general platitudes that was so adrift that once she answered, Bash had to re-ask the question.

Democratic Custodial Services – ASSOCIATED PRESS

  • Calling this pedestrian is not exactly a selling point

Desperate to deliver cleanup duty on what was a largely perplexing performance in the interview, the AP has declared that Harris was winning people over with her display of being…ordinary?

It seems odd to say this was a good result, after 40+ days of no press contact before Harris finally sits in front of the cameras, and all she was able to manage was the reaction of “Meh.” But there is the AP, declaring that this was “notable.”

Artisanally-Crafted Narratives – CNN

  • Sir, your joking could lead to someone’s death…we, think…?

CNN enjoys having J.D. Vance on its shows, mostly because he provides the network a chance to pretend to be outraged and act condescendingly toward him. That Vance largely does not take the bait and tosses the idiocy back at the hosts is what makes his visits so enjoyable.

In the latest, we have John Berman, clearly bothered by the fact that Vance dared mock Kamala Harris about her “historic” interview on Berman’s network. Vance posted a clip of what he claimed was a leaked segment of the interview. It was instead the infamous clip of a Miss Teen USA pageant contestant giving a daffy, meandering answer to a question.

Berman took this as an opportunity to pounce, as it were, on Vance and try guilting him about this clip. He was unapologetic, as is the proper response. 

Now, given the “dangerous” nature of playing clips from years past and threatening the emotional health of individuals as a result, CNN should immediately cease dredging up years-old interviews where Vance discussed cat ladies and other non-political subject matter.

Legalized Press-titution – NEWS OBSERVER

  • Seriously…we’re covering the folksy way Walz buys desserts, now?!

Well, with Joe Biden sidelined from the campaign — and also an absentee president — we suppose somebody had to step up and take over the ice cream news cycle.

Enter Tim Walz, who exited the Dana Bash interview and high-tailed to North Carolina. There, we are now treated to the fact — courtesy of Korie Dean of the local news outlet — that he stopped to get a local milkshake. Walz went with a mint selection.

So now you see, Democrats are permitted to have frivolous campaign details, just not Vance and the Republicans.

Pulitzer Prize Nomination – STAR TRIBUNE

It seems apparent that the media are desperate to report on anything but the controversies of the Democratic Party candidates. Or, for that matter, their policy agenda.

So — as a result — we have this report from Tim Walz country, where the hometown paper reports on a citizen who has come into possession of a video game system once owned by the current governor.

Blue-Anon – THE HILL

In the editorial section of The Hill, Aron Solomon proposes that the recent spike of Covid cases should be cause for us to return to all of the pandemic restrictions of 2020. Yes, he is promoting masks, distancing, and remote learning. This proposal has been met with a flood of rather vituperative opposition, and this is the proper response, once we look at this supposed “flood” of new cases hitting the nation.

Solomon, it turns out, works for a legal PR team, which means this was a paid placement of some sort, possibly to promote the K-12 aspects that the firm represents.

So, yes, Solomon and his fear-porn merchants can go get bent.

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