Culture Challenge of the Week: Adoption, an Invisible Option

One lopsided statistic easily overlooked in the abortion debate is this: 3700 abortions occur each day, drastically outnumbering the 68 adoptions that occur across all fifty states on any given day. It's "a staggering gap," says Thea Ramirez, a social worker and former adoption agency director.

Numbers like those inspired Thea, a married mother of two young children, to leap forward in faith and found a new, stunningly successful website called Adoption-Share. When you visit her site at www.adoption-share.com you will see the beauty and genius of her idea. Thea has a profoundly pro-life mission, with a very practical goal: to make adoption easier, more transparent, and more successful for all involved-licensed agencies, adoptive parents, and birthmothers.

But back to those numbers for a second. Why so few adoptions? First, most women with crisis pregnancies don't view adoption as a viable option.

Anyone who has worked with women in crisis pregnancies knows it's difficult to open women's hearts to adoption. Pregnant women often say, "I could never give my baby up for adoption. If I'm going to have the baby, I'm going to keep the baby."

When adoption seems unthinkable, these women find their "choices" reduced to two: keep the baby or abort. For some, keeping the baby loses its appeal fast or becomes untenable. A boyfriend or husband may threaten violence or abandonment if she keeps the baby. Or the women herself may realize that she lacks the human capacity to parent a child, perhaps because of drug or alcohol addiction, serious immaturity, or lack of support. The stats tell the rest of the story: In some cities, over 40% of women will choose abortion as their "best" option.

Understandably, those on the frontlines of pro-life work focus first on helping women make that life-affirming decision to carry the baby to term. Thea rightly points out, however, that through non-directive and non-coercive counseling, we can present an additional choice---to parent or not. Women in crisis pregnancies need the opportunity to hear the benefits of adoption presented gently, with time to ask questions and reflect.

The reality is that some women who admirably choose life are unable to parent - and human decency demands that we help them.