The end of the year is an important time for businesses, it’s when most retail actually goes into the black for the year (no, liberals, black Friday isn’t about race). It’s also when most charities see their budgets met, as Americans scramble for last-minute tax deductions. In the world of politics, it’s essentially meaningless. That fact, naturally, doesn’t stop any of these candidates or organizations from going all-in on the fundraising as the calendar gets set to change. While people have their wallets out, you can’t expect politicians not to try to dip in themselves.
Nancy Pelosi is right there, where you’d expect her to be. Her district is covered in feces and needles while businesses are being looted and the Speaker of the House with a net worth of around $200 million is begging average Americans for a couple of bucks to keep her in power. Let that sink in.
Under the subject line, “Insulted,” the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee sent out an email warning Democrats that Republicans are planning to run ads against them. Yes, seriously, it’s that dumb. “Kevin McCarthy launches national ad blitz against Speaker Pelosi and House Democrats,” the email screams. It’s like stopping the presses because the sun came up in the east – it’s just what happens.
“I'm calling for 4,000 Democrats to come to our Majority’s immediate defense with $3 to make these ads backfire,” Nancy declares. “Can I count on you in this moment?” No, you can’t.
“Merry Christmas, now give me some money” is actually a very fitting message coming from Democrats, isn’t it? Actually, they wouldn’t say Merry Christmas, they’d go with the generic “Happy Holidays” or something even dumber like “Happy last week of the western year,” because you wouldn’t want to offend anyone.
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Nancy has only just begun. “I’ve had it, Derek,” she continues. “I just learned Kevin McCarthy launched his FIRST national ad blitz against my House Democrats. And the worst part -- he’s using the $400,000 he raised from his outrageous floor speech to fund these attacks.” What floor speech she’s talking about, I have no idea. But I often have no idea what the hell she’s talking about, and not just because she sounds drunk or like someone whose dentures are slipping an awful lot.
“Hear me, Derek: When Republicans go after my Democratic Majority with vicious lies, you’d better believe I’m going to fight back.” For a quick reality check, Democrats consider talking about them accurately to be “vicious lies” and the knowing mistruths that leave their head holes to be the gospel truth.
To finish it off, Nancy writes, “I will not let Kevin McCarthy’s attacks go unanswered. I'm calling for 4,000 gifts before midnight to make sure every Democratic voter knows the TRUTH and ensure McCarthy’s attacks completely BACKFIRE! I'm asking you to come to my defense, Derek. Can I count on your immediate $3 to protect our Democratic House Majority?”
Why 4000 gifts? Why not 5000? Could she do whatever it is she’s planning on doing with only 3000 gifts? Why put any number on it whatsoever? And what is so magical about the $12,000 in total she’s asking for, were she to get her 4000 suckers to give her $3?
What can a nationwide campaign accomplish with $12,000? Nothing. It could buy some local ads, maybe, depending upon the market, but that’s about it. It wouldn’t even support the monthly salary of a race to hold a House seat.
No, what they really want suckers to give a couple of bucks to is their total donor numbers. Why? Have you seen those politicians who brag about their average donation size being just a few dollars? I have no doubt that number is real, but it’s also irrelevant.
The real reason to push for a large number of donors is math. If someone gives you $999,999 and someone else gives you $1, you can say your average donation is $500,000. That may not sound good, but it sounds a heck of a lot better than one donor giving a million dollars, thereby buying a politician.
All the money comes from a few rich donors, all the money that matters anyway. But that fact has to be obscured, lest people catch on. So the small-dollar donors are courted via email for headcount purposes only. It’s math, basic math, so the ruling class can pretend they aren’t beholden to large corporations and the mega-rich. Deadlines, dollar amounts, and everything else are all for show so you miss what’s really going on.
