You’ll have to forgive me. This is a difficult time for me. This week I have been forced to confront memories I’ve been trying to bury my whole life, but recent events have made that impossible. I…am a survivor of traffic jams.
It’s not easy to talk about. Just the sight of brake lights causes flashbacks to the horror of sitting on a freeway not going anywhere. But for you, dear reader, I will be strong and push on.
You probably know a victim of traffic jams yourself. You may well be one. Be silent no more! Thanks to the actions of a mid-level staffer working for New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, the sweet, nourishing mainstream media finally broke its silence on this abomination. And if the coverage this week is any indication, we’ll be hearing a lot more about this in the weeks – heck, centuries – to come.
I don’t want your sympathy, in a few years, after some therapy, I’ll bounce back … somehow. But there are others out there who won’t be as lucky. It’s the others, the people we lost, the people who won’t bounce back, who I worry about. Those are the people who need your prayers.
As I said, I’m eternally grateful the media finally came around and started to give this inhumane, collective indignity we’ve all suffered through the level of coverage it deserves. This week New Jersey, tomorrow the world!
There are a few people and groups I want to single out for special recognition in what history books undoubtedly will call our darkest hour.
To CNN, thank you! Your wall-to-wall coverage in this time of national tragedy has been second to none. The courage you’ve shown in uncluttering your airwaves of the “phony scandals” you’ve been covering over the past five years so we could know more and more and more about this is commendable. I do fear for the health of Wolf Blitzer. Yes, there is not a more trusted voice on the scourge of traffic, but the man needs his sleep. He has been hyperventilating for what seems like 36 straight hours. Please, make sure he stays hydrated and gets some rest. We will need him if, God forbid, some other random New Jersey Democrat says something about Chris Christie.
To the rest of the mainstream media, you too have shown courage in our time of need. When the three national network newscasts spent more time on the New Jersey traffic holocaust in 24 hours than the Internal Revenue Service targeting and intimidating American citizens over their political beliefs since July 1 by a factor of 44, I knew justice finally had come to America.