Meghan McCain, whom I affectionately call “The Lucky Sperm,” because cracking that egg is the only “accomplishment” her name didn’t get her, was the subject of some satire this week by Redstate.com. Turns out Ms. McCain, the media’s favorite squish and relentless seeker of the spotlight, doesn’t like it when you point out she can’t write and isn’t particularly bright. Who’da thunk it?
McCain, author of the roundly panned and rightly mocked Dirty Sexy Politics, didn’t take kindly to a satire post written by “Totally Meghan McCain” on Rick Perry. Actually written by Leon Wolf, the post mocked Meghan’s dislike of Rick Perry with her...um, shall we say, poetic use of language. Here is a sample of “Totally’s” take:
Firstly in the first place, some people had a question about my very obvious statement, “I don’t necessarily agree that Rick Perry is George Bush on crack, but he could definitely be described as George Bush 2.0.” The question, I have most often, been asked, is why I did not include literally anything in the piece to back up this claim or point out, the places where Perry and Bush are similar, the reason for that being simple. Hello? They are both from Texas. I guess I should apologize for, assuming that most people knew that already, but I guess they don’t. Well I am here to tell you in case you didn’t know: both George W. Bush and Rick Perry are from Texas. Now, in the entire time I have been paying attention to politics, there has only been one President of the United States elected from Texas. And if electing someone, from Texas was a winning strategy, then obviously, there would have been more.
Some ignorant jerk, clearly who doesn’t know about the young people, pointed out that George W. Bush 1.0 won, two elections, which is two more than my dad did. Let me just respond to that jerk by saying that George W. Bush only won those elections because he didn’t have to go against my dad either time. FACE!
It’s close to her writing style, as is any good satire, but it’s too well written to actually be her.
Don’t believe me? Here are some samples from an epic piece on Gawker.com entitled “How Did Meghan McCain Get Into Columbia?” (These are real samples of her writing.)
The baby boomers have dropped the ball on their burden of responsibility.
I am worried we are reaching some kind of breaking point when it comes to not only Americans but young Americans.
Not only have we not been given hope and change, but generation Y is feeling disillusionment and asking ourselves what exactly do we have to look forward to? Friends of mine and friends of friends of mine are all essentially dealing with the same issues and fears no matter what their backgrounds or jobs; they are worried about what kind of future we are heading into and at the same time feeling lost about how we can band together to somehow prevent the asteroid of economic debt that seems to be headed straight for us.
I apologize for your headache, but you see my point. We ain’t dealin’ with the brightest bulb on the tree here.
So after Redstate published the second satire by “Totally,” she did what any “strong, independent” woman would do - she had her lawyers write a letter demanding the posts be taken down.
The law firm of Snell and Wilmer, according to the letter, “represents Meghan McCain with respect to intellectual property matters.” Yes, “intellectual property” was just used in reference to the works of Meghan McCain. At least it was billable for the firm.
In his post about the letter, Erick Erickson, editor-in-chief of Redstate, said, “We’re confident that we are within our rights to parody and mock Meghan McCain on this. It is frankly not worth our time.”
More hysterically, and accurately, Erickson said, “We’re actually stunned that any reasonable person could read those posts and think a living human being wrote them.” True that.
For her part, McCain took to Twitter to release this little gem of a statement:
I'm a 26-year-old woman threatening to sue a website that illegally used my byline. The fact that their response was sexist is predictable.
Where exactly the sexism can be found in Redstate’s statement remains a mystery. Perhaps it’s Fantasyland. That seems to be where Meghan McCain lives, somewhere between reality and the place where Fredo Corleone really is “smaaat.” Maybe a little closer to Fredo.