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Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Rebecca Hagelin :: Townhall.com Columnist
Ten Ways to Mother
by Rebecca Hagelin
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As we approach the day we celebrate and honor mothers, I'm happy to report that moms around the country are joining with me to raise our children to become the people that God intends them to be. It's so encouraging to see a groundswell of support from moms and dads across the country for the principles and actions I promote in 30 Ways in 30 Days to Save Your Family. I continue to be encouraged and inspired by the stories of how you are rising up like mother bears and fighting the cultural lies that are robbing your kids of their best futures. Please continue to send me your challenges and successes, and I, in turn, will pass some of them along to encourage and equip other moms. You can e-mail them to me at rebecca@howtosaveyourfamily.com or through my website at www.HowToSaveYourFamily.com.

Editors' note: Subscribe to Townhall Magazine and receive a copy of Rebecca Hagelin's book free with your subscription!

Each week I also hear from new moms who know something is amiss in the culture, instinctively know they need to change how they are parenting, but aren't quite sure where to start. So what is the best way to begin? By living out the principles, behavior and values you want your children to develop.

So as I salute you in your efforts to truly mother your kids, here are ten simple ways how you can set the example for your children starting right now:

1. Always model honesty and truth. There is no difference between a "little white lie" and a "big fat lie" and our kids know it. If you are even a "tad bit" dishonest in your speech or actions you are modeling complete dishonesty. And for goodness sake, don't ever, ever ask your children to lie for you. When you instruct your kids to tell callers that you aren't home when you really are, you are damaging the development of their consciences, and asking them to sin on your behalf. Don't do it.

2. Speak up when you see or hear something wrong. Don't assume that kids will understand that something is wrong. When you encounter material or situations that offend your values, let your child know how you feel and why. Always remember that to your child, your silence is an endorsement of the behavior at hand.

3. Let your kids see you reading good material. Children and teens notice what their parents read. Stay away from the trashy "women's magazines". Go through your home right now and throw the junk away, and cancel your subscriptions. Replace it materials that actually reflect your values, and make it a point to let your kids see you reading them.

4. Show good sportsmanship. Teach your kids how to win and how to lose. A good winner doesn't gloat (although a little good-natured ribbing is okay), and a good loser doesn't pitch a fit, but is gracious and congratulates the winner. These rules also apply to academic and other contests.

5. Be a good listener. If you're always lecturing instead of listening, chances are your kids will avoid having conversations with you. Ask questions, avoid immediate negative reactions, and be available to them when they want to talk.

6. When you make a mistake, apologize. There's nothing wrong with saying, "Honey, I'm sorry I lost my temper like that." That itself sets a good example, reminding them that they shouldn't let pride interfere with doing what's right. And, if you've made a dumb mistake, your kids already know about it anyway. Avoiding the reality of your temporary lapse in judgment doesn't make the incident disappear - it only makes the memory of it hurt more. Continued...

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About The Author
Rebecca Hagelin is a public speaker on the family and culture and the author of the new best seller, 30 Ways in 30 Days to Save Your Family.
 
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Great advice!
Thanks for the reminder to do all of the above!

45 Caliber
"Don't expect me to agknowledge your presence again."

Good.
As to Joel the oppressor, just because someone "claims" to be in the special forces proves bupkis. More likely, him and Hal Donohue spend their time hanging out together at some VFW post in their minds. Anyone who invents any reason to tell us about his Green Beret cred and how manly the ladies find him deserves all the skepticism we can muster.

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