Markets in Everything: Britney Spears' Hair Edition

Mary Katharine Ham
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Posted: Feb 20, 2007 12:33 PM


That's right. You can buy Britney's hair for a non-fraudulent minimum bid of just $1 million at BuyBritneysHair.com.

With your purchase you will get this lovely periwinkle lighter actually used by Brit-Brit to light her smokes, and that's not it! You'll also get the Red Bull can she was drinking from when she came into the now infamous Esther's Haircutting Studio. But even that's not it!

You'll also get the very clippers with which Spears sheared her skull on February 16 in the year of our Lord, 2006.

Happy bidding!

And, now, because I am not immune to the lure of celebrity blogging-- I am only human!--let's for a moment reflect on the eerily prophetic lyrics to a certain 2000 single from Britney. This was Britney in her prime-- her JT-dating, 6-pack-rockin' prime-- but did she know what was to come?

This is a story about a girl named Lucky. Or is it?


She's so lucky, she's a star
But she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking
If there's nothing missing in my life
Then why do these tears come at night

Lost in an image, in a dream
But there's no one there to wake her up
And the world is spinning, and she keeps on winning
But tell me what happens when it stops?
They go…
"Isn't she lovely, this Hollywood girl?"
And they say…

She's so lucky, she's a star
But she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking
If there's nothing missing in my life
Then why do these tears come at night

Sigh. How I do miss healthy Britney.

Update: Townhall all-star intern Katie Favazza sends me this video, in which a clever video editor decided that the wages of cheating on Justin Timberlake is baldness. Mild content warning toward the end: