Posted: Apr 18, 2006 12:50 PM

Is it 1994 all over again?

I know what Hugh would say. Republicans need to buck up before the Dems manage to stage a '94-style takeover come November.

There is danger in the air, folks, that's for sure.

Need more evidence? Please see the recent rise of leggings and tapered jeans. These are the warning signs. We cannot afford to ignore them.

It's 1994, folks. Not only were Democrats in charge of everything until that November, but we inexplicably clad ourselves in hip-widening denim and flaw-defining spandex. We do not want to relive this.

The solution is very clearly a platform of fiscal restraint, robust national defense, a simplified tax system, and a responsible judiciary.

Women can get behind it to save their behinds from the tragedy that is the high-rise jean. Men can support it because the rise of the high-rise means there is no more low-rise. The two cannot coexist.

Talk about a natural constituency.

Get to work, folks, and save us from 1994.