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OPINION

The Harris Campaign Is Straight-Up Delusional

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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AP Photo/Paul Sancya

You have to wonder what world the puppet masters controlling Kamala Harris live in. It’s not our world. It’s not the universe of normal people. Maybe it’s because her handlers are robots stamped out of the commie college conformity factories. Maybe they are just stupid. Maybe they are insane. Regardless, you have to wonder just what the hell they are thinking when they try to appeal to regular voters.

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Campaigns regularly trumpet their endorsements, with Democrats getting particularly excited about the ones from various unions. That went south for Kamala not long ago when a poll of Teamster members showed that she came in third in the preference race among the working-class guys who drive things for a living, right behind Trump and herpes.

The Hoffa union’s leadership, which had regularly endorsed Dems over the last few decades, decided not to make any national endorsement. That was pretty bad, but fear not. Through its internet minions, the Harris campaign proudly announced that it had obtained the coveted endorsement of the IRS workers’ union. Yeah, they bragged about it. How does someone convince him, her, or xirself that the American people will be eager to throw their support to the candidate that the IRS likes best? What’s next – a breathless press release about how she’s the pick of the Amalgamated International Brotherhood of Professional Registered Sex Offenders?

And speaking of Diddy and Co., are her celebrity endorsements really helping? I suppose there’s a certain demographic that loves the music of Taylor Swift for some reason, but are they really going to vote based on the gut instincts of a woman whose entire oeuvre is about her bad choices in men? If she doesn’t drool over Trump and JD, isn’t it kind of a validation? 

Then there was Oprah the other day, spoon-feeding Kamala the opportunity to offer her prepackaged, awkward non-answers in a pseudo-interview setting. Is Oprah still a thing? I don’t know. I do know that a man who isn’t pretending to identify as a man watching that festival of estrogen and condescension is going to run to vote for The Donald. Julia Roberts offered her insights, and so did Meryl Streep, and there’s nothing men like better than being instructed by Hollywood crones. And I’m not convinced women dig this stuff either. They come home from the Safeway bankrupt, turn on the tube, and then watch a bunch of rich ladies dressed in clothes worth more than their cars lecture them on joy, vibes, and how only Kamala Harris will protect their sacred ability to kill babies.

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There’s also the serious policy stuff. Did you know several hundred Republicans, in the sense that they were allegedly once Republicans at about the time that the aforementioned Taylor Swift was a fetus, have endorsed Kamala? Yippee. The most famous ones are the Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Doom of formerly important Republicans, Liz Cheney and her useless father. They never met a war they didn’t like your kids to go fight for them. Kamala is very excited to have them on her side now. Kind of makes you wonder what war they have in mind for her first term. The only thing we know for sure is that no Cheney will be fighting in them.

There were other less prominent endorsers, including some literal interns from the Reagan administration. Gee, I was a congressional intern in 1986 and I’m offended no one asked me to sign on to this auspicious list. I could have had my name there between Melvin Sadsack, the Deputy Assistant for Legume Initiatives in the Bush 1.0 Department of Agriculture, and Daryl Schnarf, Alternate Board Member of the President’s Council for Metric System Implementation under Jerry Ford. Those dudes are total legends of conservatism, according to people who read stuff by David French unironically.

Trumpeting this dismal crew of washed-up nobodies is obviously a play for the normie Republicans, but here’s the thing – all the normie Republicans who this nonsense might appeal to have been Democrats since they decided that a GOP that would nominate Mitt Romney was just too edgy for their fussy, feminine tastes.

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The latest Harris campaign play was another slate of faceless endorsements, this time from “national security professionals” who consider Donald Trump a terrible danger to America’s standing in the world. These were, of course, the very half-wits who are responsible for the sorry state of America’s standing in the world. These are the guys who forgot to order enough oilers for the Navy; the captain these same dorks selected for command ran it aground, effectively neutering a carrier task force. In contrast, Israel, whose national security establishment is both serious and competent, just gave thousands of Hezbollah scumbags a faster, messier version of the gender reassignment surgery Kamala wants for illegal aliens.

These losers would not know Clausewitz from Santa Claus; for them, war is just domestic American politics by other means. Guess that explains why they don’t seem very interested in actually winning them. They are all unimpressive timeservers. Nine of them are such foreign policy geniuses that they signed the infamous “Hunter’s laptop is a Putin plot” letter, meaning they were fooled by Putin when he was not even trying to fool them.

Others are generals and admirals, as if this is going to sway the veteran vote. It’s that same certainty that they can trick the ex-military rubes by throwing Tim Walz out there because he was a commander general corporal or something in the Army. Of course, no one knows better than us vets just how transcendently incompetent and corrupt so many of the Washington generals are. The Venn Diagram of these Pentagon princes and the boards of Boeing and Raytheon are pretty much a circle. They have not unequivocally won a major war in 30 years, and now we are supposed to be awestruck that they have bestowed their blessing on Madame Brat? That the foreign policy establishment supports you is clear and convincing evidence that you suck. But if you think the last few decades with these bozos in charge have gone swimmingly for America overseas, yeah, definitely take their sage advice and back Kamala.

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Talk about tone deaf. Inexplicably, they doubled down by bringing Zelensky over here – in an Air Force jet – to hang out in Pennsylvania and interfere in our election. He had some bad things to say about Trump and Vance in between touring an artillery shell factory and signing some bombs with Governor Josh Shapiro. It’s madness. What the hell was he thinking? This was enough to rile up even the most pro-Ukrainian Republicans. Who was the person who thought the Democrats would be helped by dragging in some Slavic potentate to lecture Americans on why Trump/Vance are bad for not wanting to give more money and stuff – and maybe our sons and daughters – to a bloody, endless stalemate? Look, I like Ukraine – I trained their troops, and I admire their pluck in fighting back – but when Trump wins and this president-for-life finds out that there’s a new sheriff in town, don’t look at me for help when no one returns Kyiv’s phone calls. Nobody forced you to interfere in our politics and go all in on our opponents, or maybe the Democrats did, but you ended up choosing a side and we won’t forget. And for what? How many Americans who are not already Kamalabots will this visit sway? A fraction of the ones offended and annoyed by Ukraine’s presumption at sticking its nose into our elections – again. As usual, Putin’s best friends are the people who whine loudest about him.

What do all these plays for the votes of normal people by the Democrats have in common? A couple of things. There is the utter condescension and contempt evident in thinking that we can be dazzled by celebrities and impressed by rosters of Beltway hacks who were barely relevant back when they were relevant at all. But there is also the total disconnect between the Harris team and reality – the Democrats really think this stuff is going to work. They believe these are what will motivate Americans in this election. Not the economy. Not making America strong again. Not dog-dining Third World peasant invasions. Not weird perverts in our daughters’ locker rooms. This junk. They really don’t know us at all, and that could bite them hard at the ballot box.

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Comrade Kamala must be kept out of the White House, and we need your help to take it back. Join Townhall VIP right now to get access to my extra Wednesday column, the weekly Stream of Kurtiousness videos every Friday, my Unredacted podcast every Monday, my VIP members-only direct email address, and more! Join now! Use promo code KURT for 50% off membership.

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