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Overdosing On Wokeium

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of
AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez

Karl Marx, who is really popular among stupid and evil people, once called religion something to the effect of “the opiate of the masses,” and while that is ridiculous (real religion, far from lulling people into a stupor, activates them, which is why our garbage Establishment hates it and wants to replace it with gooey Methodism), the fact is that wokeness is itself a drug. Wokeium is the opiate of the jackasses. And our garbage Establishment is the pusher.


Why push the wokeness drug on the young, vulnerable, dumb and disenfranchised?

Because if you are obsessed with your next woke fix, with jousting with the phantom “white supremacists” who allegedly lurk around every corner, with purging the bad-thought havers who are the cause of all your disappointments and failures, you aren’t seeing who is really running the okey-doke on you.

Wokeium distorts reality. You don’t see the scam. Instead, you fixate on false enemies, “enemies” who you would see you have much in common with, if not for the woke-fueled haze.

The Establishment want us normals at war with the woke. Why? Because if we are fighting each other over that insufferable SJW nonsense, we are not uniting against the real enemy.

The real enemy that runs a rigged system where if you start getting ahead, the rules change with a phone call. Reddit/RobinHood anyone?

The real enemy that creates a system where you’re told you must go to college, where you get fed meaningless nonsense in huge, impersonal lecture halls, and then get handed a huge bill you have to pay off for the rest of your life so a bunch of bums with doctorates can enjoy their sinecures in academia.

The real enemy that creates a system where you are constantly deprived of the power to govern yourself, where you are constantly lied to, where the Establishment dines at the French Laundry while you lose your job waiting tables.

Yet, under the influence of wokeium, you hallucinate that your enemy, the cause of all your misery, is that truck driver who likes Donald Trump.


He did it, him and his bad thoughts and his Jesus and his guns. He’s why your life is a bubbling cesspool. Him, that truck driver in Chattanooga with the MAGA hat, thinking wrong things, he’s to blame for all your problems. Not the people who run all the institutions, who make all the decisions, and who hooked you on SJW junk.

That’s what wokeium makes you think, those others are bad and evil and racist and sexist and transphobic and and and…you better not talk to them! You certainly better not interact with them. You might understand that you share the same real enemy.

But if the woke addict came down off his/her/xis woke high and actually talked to that truck driver, him/her/xir might see that he/she/xe shares a lot more in common with the guy-identifying guy in the John Deere ballcap than he/she/xe does with those rich bastards pushing the wokeium.

Woke addicts have no use for the banks. Neither does he.

Woke addicts have no use for Wall Street. Neither does he.

Woke addicts have no use for endless wars that give our ruling caste a thrill. Neither does he.

He’s getting shafted by the rigged system, and so is the woke junkie.

But if you are snorting woke like Hoover Biden on a bender in Medellin, then you have to hate John Deere guy because he’s racist, only you can’t actually see any racism – he’s not running around in black face, or burning crosses, and he even seems to have black friends. But when you take a hit of wokeness you just know that racism is in there, somewhere, even if you can’t see it or touch it or hear it. 


Like all drugs, wokeness is designed to alter reality. It’s about the feelz. And the feelz are good. You take do a fat line of woke and you finally feel that you have some meaning and purpose in your life. You are on the side of right, damn it, and it feelz so good. Finally, a crusade, a struggle, something that gives you a purpose. Wokeium gives you that meaning you never got anywhere else because your parents, themselves broken and battered by the same system that makes sure your woke bong is always brimming, split up. Your mom didn’t take you to church, and your community was no community at all. You grew up empty, yet yearning for meaning as all people do. And into that void vein, the Establishment injected the wokeium. 

The first hit was free, but the next one cost you. Now you’re an addict. You’ll always be after that incredible first-time high, which is why wokeism gets crazier and crazier as the addicts chase the SJW dragon. It started with the uncontroversial idea of not being a bigot against black people. Now, fatism is a thing. Tomorrow, maybe it’s time to stamp out smart privilege. 

Woke addicts see the white supremacists everywhere, under the bed, climbing the walls, watching them from the dark.

Woke addicts know that men can transform into women – and back! – from the power of wanting, and the junkies revel in the ecstasy of victory over mere reality by accepting that many men menstruate.

Woke addicts know that the bad people are all around them, but are weirdly never found in Bel Air or the Hamptons or Scat Francisco (ignoring the piles of yesterday’s soup kitchen sandwiches and prickly hypos scattered across the sidewalk make you a good person!). But you’re positive they’re all over middle America, though you’ve never actually been there. That’s where you find the bad people, who just happen to be the enemies of the people pushing the wokeium.


What a weird coincidence, huh?

Face it.

If you are woke, you’re a junkie, hooked on the transitory meaning you get by being on the side of fake righteousness. Look around you. Your friends are ugly, pierced, and always angry. So are you. Meth wrecks your teeth, but woke wrecks you body and soul. It’s just that wokeness makes you feel something, and for you – betrayed by a ruling caste that exploits you and hooks you on its lies – that’s enough.

But it doesn’t have to be.

You can kick the habit. You can get sober. You can get the non-human primate organism – fight the scourge of speciesism! – off your back.

Wokeness is a drug that distorts your reality in order to blind you to your own interest and to prevent you from allying with people who have likewise been wronged by a rigged system.

Wokeness divides the Establishment’s opposition, so the woke addicts are fighting a fake enemy instead of the real one.

So, skip a hit. Get clean. Sober up. And take a look at those people you have been drugged up into believing are your enemy. Talk to that Trump guy you were told to hate. See how he thinks the same about big corporations, government lies, and stupid wars as you do. You’ll see they aren’t enemies. And, most dangerously of all for our garbage Establishment, you’ll see who really is your real enemy is for the first time.

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Guns. Victory. Making fun of leftist losers. It’s all there in my newest novel, Crisis, as well as my other four novels of America splitting into red and blue, People's Republic, Indian Country, Wildfire, and Collapse! CAUTION: These books are full of bad thoughts and unapproved ideas, so if you’re a conformist sissy just keep walking.

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