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Masks And Other Madness

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of
AP Photo/Rich Pedroncelli, Pool, File

I’m pretty tired of the whole pangolin pandemic panic and the manifest bullSchiff surrounding every aspect of it. I’m not a COVID Truther. There’s a virus. It makes people sick. It can kill old people and people with other health problems. Everyone else is pretty much safe. Not everyone, but the vast majority. And it’s time to get on with our lives.

See, people who are vulnerable to this disease – and I have them in my family and among my friends – should stay away from other people. Those of us who aren’t especially vulnerable, well, we need to get on with our lives. So, vulnerable people should hunker and invulnerable people should be able to go about their business. Simple.

But no. No, that’s too simple and common sense. Some pols love this whole crisis because this is really exciting and, coincidentally, a way to increase their own power. Flexing emergency muscles is fun, you know. No one calls you with complaints about boring old potholes when a pestilence is sweeping the land. You’ll note how every major Democrat-run city, but I repeat myself, is getting worse. They can’t do the basics so they focus on the extremes.

And some people like living in this soft dystopia. This passes for excitement in the safe and secure nation we were handed. For the same reason that suburban housewives guzzle cheap pinot grigio from Trader Joe’s and read White Fragility, this “crisis” gives them something to fill up the emptiness in their souls.

But as for the people whose lives are being wrecked, and the kids who are treading water for a year, too bad. They are acceptable collateral damage – it’s calamity theater, and the show must go on. That it is perceived as hurting Donald Trump only makes it sweeter.

What gets me in particular are the lies and the deliberate obfuscations designed to drag this idiocy out. Remember back in February when all the Smart Folks™ were telling us we were stupid if we wore masks? Now all the Smart Folks™ are telling us that we have to wear masks everywhere. I swear, the next dummy I see driving around with a mask on in his car is getting rammed.

And then there was the “flatten the curve” thing. We agreed to be locked up to prevent a surge of infections that would overwhelm the system knowing this means the pandemic would keep going longer. So, we beat the surge and yet they are now freaking out that the pandemic is lasting longer – just as they told us it would.

Oh, and we needed to do more testing, and now we have, and – SHOCKER! – we are finding more infections. Who saw that coming, besides everyone who isn’t an idiot? Of course, the death rate as a percentage of infections has dropped, meaning the virus is less deadly than we feared. But we can’t have that positive news, so even though the absolute number of deaths are also generally lower now (it bounces around a bit) they still have to pretend this whole country is one of Andrew Cuomo’s nursing home death traps.

It’s not. Kids are safe, and we should reopen schools – without ridiculous precautions. The Chinese kids are back studying STEM; ours are looking out the window bored to tears wasting valuable time. But hey, the teachers’ union have to take priority, and you know those public-school unionized teachers are super-eager to stop being paid for doing nothing. Kids first, as usual. Also, unicorns.

And remember – any time you point out that maybe the experts aren’t exactly brimming with expertise, you are denying science (The “deny science” silliness is Lie #13 in my new book!).

Now, as I was writing this missive, my half-wit governor re-closed much of California because a lot of people who aren’t going to get that sick are getting sick. Yeah, getting your cuticles buffed or buying tacos is spreading the virus – not tens of thousands of people screaming as they walk packed together down the streets. Apparently wokeness makes you immune to the bat soup grippe. Hey, that’s some real science right there, deniers!

Look, this is a real virus that is dangerous to a few types of people. They need to take precautions. But the rest of us need to not have our lives upended in a hopeless struggle to stop the inevitable. I’ll wear a mask around people who ask me to because they are vulnerable, and in places where the owner asks me to – your place, your rules. That’s merely polite, and if I don’t wish to wrap a bandana around my mouth then I’ll avoid those people and places. Otherwise, no. I’m not slinking around like I’m trying to pull off some sort of suburban stagecoach robbery.

And I’m not going to pretend that the same people who told us so much demonstrably wrong stuff are some sort of geniuses.

Want a vaccine against the liberal stupidity virus? Join Townhall VIP, and order a copy of my just-released Regnery non-fiction book, The 21 Biggest Lies About Donald Trump (and You!) and you will be immune to the mindless fabrications of the libs and their serfs!


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