Climb Aboard the Jobs Train- in the Age of the Airplane

Posted: Mar 09, 2013 12:01 AM

“236,000 jobs created in February, how about that!  It’s absolutely amazing, who said it couldn’t be done?  We’ve turned things around so get on board — the train is leaving the station.”

That would be the opening paragraph on my résumé if I was applying for a mainstream media job. 

After all, to be in that arena, you need to be like a hungry dog just waiting for that piece of meat to tear into, no matter how rancid the meal. 

Of course, I would need to put on the blinders and ignore certain facts such as the reported February birth/death number of 102,000 jobs. 

You’ll hear the pundits reject the argument of seasonality the first Friday of each month, but then you’ll also hear the very same commentators accept some bureaucrat assumed 100,000 job increase because of probability or possibility, not reality. 

I would also have to accept the premise that the majority of those not counted in the workforce -in order to lower the unemployment rate- are, in fact, retirees. 

That assumption would be based upon the thinking that everyone age-62-and-over has adequately provided for their retirement and has no need for any interest income on their safe money. 

Could I buy into both of those ideas? 


Brian Williams (NBC) does, so why not me? 

I would also need to demonstrate incredible enthusiasm for the actual breakdown of the jobs themselves, not the job types, but the geographical locations.  So, let’s assume the real number of jobs created in February was 134,000 (236,000 minus 102,000.) 

Yet, not wanting to insult any senator or congressman about their ability to secure jobs, let’s presume that in each state the government has created an equal number of 2,680 of jobs (134,000 divided by 50 states.) 

Next, assume that each state on average has 30 counties (2,680 divided by 30), meaning 89 jobs per county.  Then, let’s imagine that each county has 30 towns and 30 villages within the border (89 divided by 60), that’s approximately 1.5 jobs. 

I guess I could make the case that Phoenix AZ actually has double that amount (3 jobs) and Mesa, AZ (0 jobs) in deference to my neighbor Senator John McCain, if I was so inclined. 

Thus, my excitement should be unbridled! 

However, perhaps my opening paragraph wasn’t enthusiastic enough for the job.  In hindsight, it appears that the sheer degree of demand necessary for me to suspend my belief in reality is much greater than I’m willing to accept. 

Therefore, no mainstream media job for me. 

Just the sound of a train in the distance, leaving our economy behind.