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OPINION

Tricky Dicky Hillary

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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Hillary is "the one." She is our gift from God. Mana from Heaven. The gift that keeps on giving. Conservatives should get down on their knees and thank God for Hillary.

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Okay, enough thanking and praying. Now let's destroy her.

I speak at business conferences all over the world about my expertise- branding. The GOP has the greatest branding opportunity in modern history. Hillary is easier to brand than even Mitt Romney was for Democrats.

Destroy Hillary now and it leaves Democrats between a rock and a hard place. Here's how to brand Hillary. This will be fun. It's like shooting fish in a barrel. Hillary makes this job a joy!

Hillary should be branded with the name "TRICKY DICKY HILLARY." She is a Nixon clone. A protege. She learned well from ole "Tricky Dicky."

Let's make sure America understands the Nixon connection. Hillary was a lawyer on the committee investigating Nixon’s scandals. She knew all about the erased Nixon audiotapes. She learned well. That must be where she got the idea to delete 32,000 emails and wipe the server clean. Like Nixon, she decided what we the people had a right to know. Then she pressed “delete.” That's the first TV ad to run 24 hours a day.

Why did she delete 32,000 emails? What she afraid of. There's the million dollar question. My guess is she was petrified of four dead American bodies at Benghazi. Then there was the cover-up of the four murders. Destroy her with her own words, “What difference does it make?” Those were Hillary's words in front of a Congressional committee about the Benghazi tragedy. Four heroes were murdered. She participated in a cover-up and all she could think to say was, “What difference does it make?” Meaning those young heroes are all dead, so who cares?

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Her own TV ads in 2008 bragged about her decision-making abilities at 2 AM when the important call comes in. Well we now know what she said when that call came in during the attack on Benghazi. She heard our heroes were about to be murdered and she said, “What difference does it make?” Then she went back to sleep.

I suggest TV ad campaigns featuring the parents of those four men abandoned by Hillary and Obama and left to die at the hands of a radical Muslim mob. Who supplied the arms? America? Under Hillary's direction? Why wasn't more security provided? Why wasn't a rescue ordered? Who was involved in the coverup? Let’s ask the parents of those four dead Americans how they feel about Hillary. Put their answers on a TV commercial 24 hours a day.

Then let's use Hillary's own words to ask a crucial question: "What difference did Hillary make as Secretary of State?" Name her accomplishments? The world was in flames, the Middle East melted down, ISIS was born, Iran laughed in our face as they built a nuclear program- all under her leadership. True she flew around the world. Bravo. But the results are devastating. The world is a far more dangerous place. What difference did she make?

“We were dead broke when we left the White House.” There’s another great line straight from Hillary's mouth. I'm guessing she believed it at the time. She was desperate for money. Maybe that’s why the Clintons stole the china and furniture on the way out the White House door. Maybe that’s why $6 billion went missing at the State Department under her watch. When you’re broke, $6 billion can make a big difference. Play that TV ad 24 hours a day.

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Hillary says she is a “woman of the people.” She’s one of us. But she hasn’t driven a car since 1995. Picture a TV ad with chauffeurs driving Miss Hillary. Be sure they are identified as the leaders of the same Muslim nations that gave millions in donations to her Clinton Foundation. Run that TV ad 24 hours a day.

Hillary is all about the middle class. She has decided to make the middle class the centerpiece of her campaign for president. But “Mrs. Middle Class” demands $300,000 for a one-hour speech and a Gulfstream private jet to take her there and back.

She also gets the Presidential Suite at a 5 star hotel, or she won’t show up. No Marriots, Hiltons or Holiday Inns for Hillary. Run that story on TV ads 24 hours a day. Let’s see how middle class women respond to her list of demands.

Hillary is all about honesty and transparency. But it turns out she bought 2 million fake Facebook fans. I guess those are the things you have to do when you ask middle class college kids paying obscene tuition to pay for your $300,000 speeches and private jets. It must be hard to find real fans! Run that story in a TV ad 24 hours a day.

Now back to the main course: The Clinton Foundation. The Clintons have raised over $2 billion dollars in donations from the wealthiest people, companies and foreign governments in the world. Hillary's not “conflicted.” Rather she is completely 100% bought and paid for. If she wins the Presidency she should wear pantsuits custom designed with patches from corporate sponsors. You know like NASCAR. She should have Penske and Valvoline patches on her pantsuits. The White House should say “America’s House, Brought to you by the government of Saudi Arabia.”

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Hillary says she fights for the rights of women…yet she accepts hundreds of millions in donations from Muslim governments that stone women…make them hide behind veils…don’t allow them to drive without a man in the car…don’t allow them to be educated…and arrest and whip them (occasionally even execute them) for being the victims of rape. She could be the biggest hypocrite in the history of politics.

Here’s a great line for TV commercials: “When a Muslim country gives a $10 million check to The Clinton Foundation…then stones a woman to death…what does Hillary say? "THANK YOU." Run that TV ad 24 hours a day.

Hillary says she fights for the rights of gays. She tweeted her disgust at the new Indiana law protecting religious freedom. But she gladly accepted multi-million dollar checks from Muslim governments that stone gays and drop them off roofs of buildings. This is the biggest sellout in the history of world politics.Run that TV ad 24 hours a day.

Remember Hillary’s TV commercial about that important phone call at 2 AM. We need to run TV ads asking, “When that call comes in at 2 AM, and it involves one of those countries that gave millions to the Clinton Foundation, do you trust Hillary Clinton to make the decision that is best for America…for taxpayers…for your children? Hillary Clinton- bought and paid for by foreign governments.”Run that TV ad 24 hours a day.

Run all of those diverse TV ads 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, starting N-O-W. Brand and define Hillary long before the election.

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That puts Democrats in a very difficult, if not impossible position. Do they nominate this deeply flawed, walking billboard of corruption and hypocrisy? Do they run for President with a standard bearer that has been morphed into Richard Nixon? Or do they dump her for an unknown? If they dump her, is there time to raise the money for a complete unknown? Will there be any money left after Hillary has sucked Democrat donors dry? Is there time to vet the replacement candidate for flaws? Is there time to introduce the new candidate to American voters and still win the election?

Democrats have put all their eggs in one tired, worn out, entitled Pinata. It's time to start whacking away at Tricky Dicky Hillary.

This is going to be fun!

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