Conservatives have this uncanny ability to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory and overplay every hand dealt them. They squandered the Reagan Revolution by parsing and dicing an agenda of positions unobtainable from even the most charismatic, or messianic of candidates. The color required to attain “conservative” credentials on the litmus paper appears in no color wheel known to man. The acceptable candidates in this category are whittled to a pencil point that can only scribe the name of Ronald Reagan.
In the hopes that more people would have adopted his manner of principled politics, abandoning the mud fight that is covering the nation in sludge, conservatives have searched diligently for an heir apparent while consistently aborting their own. No one is pure enough, conservative enough, and principled enough to wear that mantel, yet they still hold every elected official to that standard. And, ironically, the country holds the entire Republican Party to that same standard while acknowledging that the Democrats and their party are incapable of feigning an attempt at such lofty heights.
Barney Frank is seen as the voice of all that is virtuous in sexual preference while Mark Foley is run out of town on a rail for his dalliances in alternative lifestyles. Senator Larry Craig is tarred and feathered by the giddy left while claiming the right is homophobic. Tom Delay is driven out of office by an over zealous partisan prosecutor while Congressman William Jefferson commandeers government sources to salvage his personal items, including the $90,000 in his freezer. George Allen can utter a made up word that morphs into a racial slur while the Democrat who filibustered the Civil Rights Bill gets a pass, once again. I’m not really sure what happened to Newt Gingrich, but I am sure he didn’t lie under oath or seduce an intern like Bill Clinton did. Bill has had so many sexual improprieties it would require a certified public accountant to keep track of them and somehow he is the victim and the women are the vile creatures seduced by that siren of the right wing conspiracy. His wife gets the mea culpa senate seat in a state she has never lived in, and a multi-million dollar house she didn’t spend a dime on . . . and she is the victim, not the women her husband abused.
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