I never expected to be on the same list with the leader of the New Black Panthers (Malik Zulu Shabbaz), a former Grand Wizard of the Knights of the Ku Klux Klan (David Duke), a Jew-bashing White Supremacist (Don Black), and a Neo-Nazi (Morris Gullet), but thanks to the investigative genius of the Southern Poverty Law Center (the SPLC), I have made it into the big time.
Yes, according to the SPLC’s latest “Intelligence Report” (Summer 2012, Issue Number: 146), I am now on the illustrious list of “30 New Activists Heading Up the Radical Right.” (You may want to think twice about reading the rest of this article. It’s possible that your computer or digital device will be tracked by anti-radical-right cybermoles.)
Also on the list were Pamela Geller (anti-Muslim!), Joseph Farah of World Net Daily (Patriot movement!), and David Barton (anti-gay historical revisionist!), among others. Yes, these are just some of the “new activists heading up the radical right.” How ominous.
In keeping with their pattern of not always getting the facts right, the SPLC lists my year of birth as 1967, which would make me really precocious (and probably all the more dangerous), since it would mean that I was bar-mitzvahed at the age of one in 1968 (surely a first in Jewish history), that I graduated high-school at the age of 6 in 1973, was married at the age of 9 in 1976, and became a father at the age of 10 in 1977, the same year I graduated from college. That should get me membership in Mensa rather than a place on the SPLC’s hit list.
Interestingly, what the SPLC actually reports about me is not that bad: I am “not typical of most who push the idea that a cabal of liberal media elites have orchestrated a so-called ‘homosexual agenda’ to indoctrinate children into a lifestyle that makes a mockery of Christian values.” But I have “ventured beyond seminary walls to take on a new, activist anti-LGBT project, selling [myself] as an expert speaker on the issue of ‘cultural revolution.’” Regarding the silencing intimidation of gay activists and their allies, the SPLC quotes me as saying, “Speak now or forever hold your peace.” I plead guilty as charged!
So what is it that earns me the honor of making the big list of 30? The article actually states that, “Unlike many other voices on the religious right, Brown generally has avoided the kind of slashing rhetoric that often devolves into rank defamation. His work is heavily footnoted and avoids the blanket pronouncements that have gotten others in trouble.”