Humberto Fontova

For historical truths you’ll never get from the New York Times, NPR, The History Channel, CNN NBC much less your history professor click on Dancing With The Stars nowadays.

I’m serious, here, at least for recent shows. This week’s show sent hearts-a-thumping and knees-a-knocking from People Magazine to the Hollywood Gossip. The legendary (after only a few weeks on the show ) heartthrob William Levy cranked up the heat on last week’s show when the Cuban refugee ripped his shirt open for a sizzling salsa routine with dance partner Cheryl Burke.

“You are ridiculously HOT!” hyperventilated Judge Carrie Ann Inaba, to the panting couple, who score near the top as we go to press.

But you ladies eager to see more of William Levy in showbiz better hope his agent counsels the soap-star wisely. “Watch your mouth, William!” Let’s hope she’s berating after last week’s show. “Now about that hokey stuff you were saying in the backstage segment. Billy--what’s the matter with you,?!” Granted, you’re fairly new to this country. But serious bloopers like “the best day of my life was the day I came to the United States from Cuba.”—No-NO-NO, Billy boy!”

“You sound like Marco Rubio, Billy! Granted he was born here. So he’s speaking mostly for his parents—but look at the relentless hatchet-jobs against him in the media!

‘Then Cheryl asks you why you came to the U.S. and you answered: “because people have no future in Cuba..It doesn’t matter how much you work in Cuba.” (This from a nation that prior to Castroism took in more immigrants per-capita than did the U.S. Most of these, much like Levy’s own grandparents, were Europeans seeking the well-known “Cuban dream” of the time.)

“Then, Billy, you add insult to injury by telling your dance partner: “In Cuba you get a quarter of a chicken per month. They give you one piece of bread per person a day. So, it makes your life really tough.” (This from a nation that pre-Castro enjoyed the 3rd highest protein consumption in the Western Hemisphere, more doctors and dentists per capita than the U.S., the 13th lowest infant mortality in the world and was net exporter of food.)

“In this country people think Cubans just drive over to their nearest Safeway and buy all the bread they want, Billy. So here you’re telling them that the Stalinist regime mandates their food intake! That’s a low-blow to their fantasies, Billy.”


Humberto Fontova

Humberto Fontova holds an M.A. in Latin American Studies from Tulane University and is the author of four books including his latest, The Longest Romance; The Mainstream Media and Fidel Castro. For more information and for video clips of his Television and college speaking appearances please visit www.hfontova.com.