President Obama and Congress are mighty generous. They’re worried we citizens don’t have enough money to go out and shop till we drop. They’re specially concerned about grandpa and grandma.

So, a check from the federal government will soon be mailed. Thanks, Obama. We sure appreciate it, Hu Jintao.

It’s not yet a done deal, of course, but our Nobel Laureate in Chief has proposed sending $250 to 57 million senior citizens. If we had only invested more money in education during past years, we could all now do the math to figure out how much this will actually cost.

On the other hand, math is such an uncaring subject.

Democrats in Congress have quickly signaled they just love the idea. House Republican Leader John Boehner likes the concept as well. Though, to show his new fiscally responsible attitude, he’s suggesting the money come from the already borrowed and unspent stimulus funds previously passed by Congress.

Boehner has, indeed, put his finger on one of the strange new problems facing our Republic: Government’s inability to spend our money fast enough.

Let’s face it: If some of us don’t have 250 new reasons to go splurge a little at the mall, the economy won’t be pumped up enough to create more jobs. Plus, without ever larger deficits, the Red Chinese will have to go back to the drawing board to figure out where to invest their excess cash.

Why should the money go to seniors? Well, it’s only fair. After all, Social Security recipients aren’t getting a cost of living increase this year — for the first time in over 30 years.

Why no cost of living raise in benefits? Well, due to a mere technicality — the cost of living didn’t actually increase last year (thanks, recession!).

Seniors also deserve a reward for coming out to vote so regularly. We don’t want them discouraged about our great country with a congressional election next year. Call it an investment in democracy. Continued...