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Friday, April 18, 2008
Paul Greenberg :: Townhall.com Columnist
Jimmy Carter's Latest
by Paul Greenberg
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"Will all great Neptune's ocean wash this blood
Clean from my hand? No; this my hand will rather
The multitudinous seas incarnadine,
Making the green one red."
- Macbeth

He started out all right. Jimmy Carter always does. Whether as president or ex-. Remember when he was the country's bright, shining hope after Richard Nixon's reign of darkness and then the vague non-administration of Gerald Ford, the Great Pardoner?

But before long Americans were looking back to the nondescript Mr. Ford as if he'd been George Washington. Nothing made the bumbling, likeable Gerald Ford look better than having been succeeded by a walking, ever-talking disaster.

The Carter administration was that bad: stagflation, gas lines, appeasement, never-ending sanctimony . . . . You name a colossal mistake and Jimmy Carter probably made it a policy.

As a former president, Mr. Carter started off well, too, wielding hammer and nails with Habitat for Humanity. Good for him. When he was building houses, the worst he risked was a bruised thumb. But then he decided he was God's gift to American foreign policy, and began making trouble for every chief executive and commander-in-chief who came after him.

Was there any part of the globe, from the Caribbean to the Middle East, from Haiti to North Korea to the Balkans, where Jimmy Carter didn't cozy up to dictators? Wherever he goes, tyrants smile. The long, dispiriting trail of former President Carter's overseas travels has been marked by one diplomatic disaster after another.

As for Jimmy Carter's role as a monitor of free-and-fair elections, the low point must have come when he gave his blessings to Robert Mugabe's takeover in Zimbabwe. Naturally, utter disaster followed. It hasn't ceased there since.

And now Mr. Carter is at it again, preparing to pay court to just about the bloodiest terrorist leader in the Middle East, which is no mean distinction in those violent parts. He's about to lend his ex-presidential presence to terrorist chieftain Khaled Meshaal, who as head of Hamas hides out in Damascus under Syrian aegis. (Let others die for the cause in Gaza; its leader is quite comfortable, thank you.) The only proper greeting for someone like Mr. Meshaal would be, "You're under arrest." Instead, we can expect to see Jimmy Carter pay his usual homage to those who champion violence. Continued...

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"Carter, in my opinion,
was one of the nation's finest presidents when it came to the environment; in particular, he deserves kudos for throwing the weight of his administration behind the Alaska Lands bill. I think his now-tarnished reputation will improve with time and better understanding of the unpredictable and intractable events that plagued his ill-starred presidency. True, his patient course did not free hostages in Iran. Yet his control of the executive branch looks positively inspired -- and aboveboard -- when compared with the criminal chaos that resulted when President Reagan turned the 'cowboys' on his National Security staff loose in the Iran-contra affair."

-- Morris K. Udall (U.S. Rep. (Dem.) Ariz. 1961-1991), "Too Funny to be President" (Henry Holt & Co. 1988), at page 143.

An Obvious Love Affair
At a secret Damascan location two star-crossed lovers exchange their undying love for one another.

Khaled Meshaal: "Geeme eye lorr yoo mang."
Jimmy Carter: "No I love you Khaled."
Khaled Meshaal: "Non geeme yoo no unnerstahn, eye lorr yoo mang."
Jimmy Carter: "No Khaled you don't understand, I love you infinity."
Khaled Meshaal: "Dats wheely wheely schweet of yoo-eye blow yoo keysees now."
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