Townhall Celebrates America 250
Where Are the Obamas and the Clintons on the Monsters Taking Over Their...
A Quick Bible Study Vol. 327: God’s Name in the Declaration of Independence
The Leech Has Two Daughters—Give and Give
Don’t Shop at Von’s
12 Score and 10 Years Ago
Make Unsubsidized Passenger Rail a Condition of the Union Pacific-Norfolk Southern Merger
Obamacare's Fraud Bill Just Came Due
Ellison's Independence Day Video Sparks Backlash Amid Pardon Scandal
Operation Patriot Shield Nets 224 Fugitive Arrests Across Missouri, Illinois
Department of War Awards Mike Rowe’s Foundation $10 Million to Rebuild Skilled Trades
Independence Day Revealed the Death Throes of Peak Woke
Two Men Indicted in $35 Million Medicaid Ambulette Fraud Scheme
Illegal Alien CDL Holder Kills Pennsylvania State Trooper in Horrific Accident
House Republicans Celebrate the America That Democrats Are Trying to Destroy
OPINION

10 Liberal Limericks for 2013

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
10 Liberal Limericks for 2013

In clear violation of op-ed protocol, this week I’m suspending prose and having a little good, clean, limericky fun at liberals’ expense because – well, because they just make it so darn easy. (Warning: Some are bad and others worse. Side effects may include groaning, nausea, vomiting and involuntary eye-rolling.)

Advertisement

Here they are in no particular order. Happy New Year, and may God bless you in 2014! (Yes, you too, my liberal friends.)

Duck Flap
There once was a fella named Phil,
With truisms liberals found shrill,
Though they cried for his head,
They got duck-slapped instead,
As old Phil just continues to chill.

GLAAD Tidings
There once was an outfit called GLAAD,
That when faced with the Truth gets real mad,
Though they pout and they fuss,
And they stomp and they cuss,
They alter the Truth not a tad.

Low Ratings
M – S – N – B – C is on cable,
Spinning news, weaving yarns and tall fables,
With an agenda from Sodom,
And ratings rock bottom,
They have hosts that are questionably stable.

Occupy This
Occupy Wall Street did sizzle,
But in 2013 it did fizzle,
As we all remained patient,
They returned to mom’s basement,
With outrage that proved artificial.

Healthcare.gov
The Obamacare roll-out disaster,
Made media question their master,
But doubt was short-lived,
As the suck up revived,
To the din of conservative laughter.

Fore!
There once was a man from Chicago,
A golf aficionado,
Who teed off on our freedom,
And caused speech induced tedium,
Empty suit with a hopey-change motto.

Advertisement

Thanks, Michelle
There once was a chain-smoking POTUS,
Who gave children a lunch lady FLOTUS,
She swapped meat, sweets and bread,
With beansprouts instead,
Adding tofu and seaweed for bonus.

New Constitution
Of Obama’s Amendments least favored,
He finds First, Fourth and Second ill-flavored,
If you’d just shut your mouth,
And disarm there, Deep South,
He could kick in your door most unlabored.

“Gay Marriage”
The Supreme Court did redefine marriage,
And defenders of marriage disparage,
Newfound “right” they pretend,
Has Stephan to wed Sven,
Yet no Sally means no baby carriage.

Cruz Control
There once was a leader from Texas,
Whom RINOs did label as reckless,
Spoke a day without resting,
All his critics thus besting,
With a smack-down on federal excesses.

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Townhall Videos

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement