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Who the Hell Is in Charge?

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
AP Photo/Alex Brandon

Last week President * went out for ice cream again, and the media was on it, quizzing him on what flavor he selected, the kind of cone, whether it was yummy. It seemed to be yummy, according to the flashcards that he uses to help him survive these intense journalist grillings. It’s great to know that our alleged president is capable of licking an ice cream cone. Unfortunately, besides watching “Matlock'' reruns, that’s about all this crusty old weirdo can do.


He’s senile, and he’s a mess. That’s not open to debate, because we aren’t allowed to debate it – at least not in the mainstream media. It is the truth which must not be uttered. Everyone sees the emperor has no clothes, mostly because Dr. Jill went out for coffee and Joe forgot to put on his pants again.

So, who is actually in charge?

Is anyone?

Now, the lack of someone in charge is not necessarily bad. The last thing we want is for an intense, vital leader focusing the collection of pinkos, commies, and bizarre mutations that make up the *dministration on achieving its nefarious ends. But what we have here seems to be a patchwork quilt of bureaucrats, politicos, and social media blue checks each pushing individual fetishes instead of their awful agenda as a whole. The result is not just chaos– ah, glorious chaos– but the ham-handed way they are going about it is also energizing we normals’ resistance.

It’s a perfect storm of failure, and we should help them fail however we can.

Take the New New Deal from a guy who was probably 50 when the Old New Deal was dealt. Who was honchoing this Schiffshow? What was the plan?

“I know, let’s get our pals in the media to hassle Joe Manchin so much that he commits political seppuku and kills the filibuster!”


That’s not a plan. That’s not even a tactic. That’s just stupid. 

Since that dumb campaign failed, it was on to Infrastructure Plan B, as in “Bipartisanship.” Somebody unwrapped the shawl from around Mr. 10% For The Big Guy and trundled him out to the White House lawn to stand with Mitt and the Mayo Gang and announce that they have all figuratively built bridges across the aisle to build bridges in real life and, incidentally, to do a lot of other things that involve giving your money to Democrat interest groups. Remember, looting your savings is infrastructure!

Now, this would be all fine and good except someone let Grandpa Badfinger talk again. A few hours later he spilled the beans on how the scheme was to sucker the GOP into voting for the bipartisan nonsense and then link it to the monopartisan nonsense. Cue the tapdancing as they went into damage control mode.

Is anyone in charge of this guy, or of any part of the government at all?

Look at the military. Where’s the leadership there? It’s just been ceded over to those four-star mediocrities who want to shelve Sun Tzu in favor of the insights of Ibram X. Kendi (née Henry Rogers). There’s a big, ugly enemy literally over the horizon, but challenging China is hard and no one pats you on the head for that. So, you decide to please the left by pretending that the real enemy is the weather, but you still retain your flexibility to meet emerging opportunities to suck up to the garbage ruling class. That’s why when those terrifying unarmed selfie-taking seniors insurrected, the gang who can’t win a war decided that the scary threat of extremism – by which they mean disagreeing with the regime – is the new Big Bad du jour. Maybe they can finally wring the victory they’ve been denied by actual enemies out of fighting people without guns but with arthritis.


Over in Europe, America is giving the farm away to Putin, who used to be the worst guy ever but now gets the thumbs-up for a big gas pipeline to Germany. Oh, and Ukraine’s lethal aid to defend itself from Russia is held up – wait, didn’t we impeach someone for not giving Ukrainians aid? And in Geneva, someone is negotiating with the mullahs, by which I mean begging them to enter into an agreement where they pretend to not be making the Bomb anymore.

Who is coordinating this? It’s not that withered old fossil.

What it seems to be is various fiefdoms within the *dministration each doing their own thing, a federalism of failure as it were. And the best part is that their tunnel vision keeps them from seeing where they are creating huge issues for the *dministration as a whole. Take CRT, please. The PC platoon is going full-tilt on it, using the bureaucracy to push this crap without any regard for the fact that everyone hates it, except liberals. They see this as their one shot to take this noxious brew of racism and Marxism out of the faculty lounge and throw it into normal people’s faces, but what they are doing is spinning up a backlash. When little Billy – because normal people name their kids normal names and not annoying ones like “Kaden” – comes home and announces his teacher’s pronouns are xip/xork and that he is personally responsible for slavery, that motivates people to resist.


The same with crime. The *dministration is packed with libs who insist that the cause of crime is not criminals but you normal people out there who are not committing crimes. Except, that’s insane and stupid, and when your Prius gets broken into a third time, you’re going to start moving right whether or not you have a “BERNIE 2020” sticker on the bumper or not.

What’s up with the border? Let everyone in, how can that go wrong? Except it already is going wrong for the Dems. The Texas border region used to be deep blue. It’s not anymore. 

Maybe Dr. Jill is in charge – after all, she’s a doctor. It can’t be Kamala – she’s busy not going to the actual border. Is it someone on the White House staff? Or is it nobody at all?

Hey, maybe it’s the scoop jockey at the ice cream parlor. Yeah, put him in charge – he sure can’t do any worse.

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