Back in March, when people started asking me to smoke cigarettes, I declined. Not only did I decline, but I said I would never smoke cigarettes. Why? Because smoking cigarettes causes cancer. It is a no brainer.
There is ample evidence of the fact. The data is voluminous showing a direct link between cigarettes and cancer. But smoking cigarettes does not just cause cancer. There are all sorts of other ill effects. Cigarette smokers tend to prematurely age. Their skin wrinkles, their voice deepens, they get yellow teeth and stained skin. They may get emphysema as well as asthma. Then there is the smell. Cigarette smokers smell. They also lose their sense of smell. Smokers know they smell like cigarettes so they often overdo cologne and perfume to compensate, which just makes it worse.
Down ballot ... errrr ... downwind from the cigarette smoker is also a problem. The secondhand effects of cigarette smoking can cause cancer in others, along with asthma, emphysema, and a host of other pulmonary problems. This has been documented. It is well known. There is no reason to pretend otherwise.
Still, despite all the evidence about how bad smoking cigarettes can be, a lot of people intend to light up and inhale. But a funny thing is happening. These people are demanding the rest of us start smoking cigarettes as well. They seem to think that if we all start smoking then no one will get cancer. That is just not so. Not only does that not neutralize the cancer threat, it also just means far more people down wind are affected by all the smoke.
November is coming, and with it, more likely than not a diagnosis of cancer. The smokers do not seem to be inclined to stop smoking cigarettes. They made the fatal mistake of believing the hype and marketing. The people on television, radio, and the internet who personally profit by an increased demand in smoking have done a remarkable job selling a poison.
Unfortunately, the temptation a lot of these cigarette smokers are going to have in November is to blame others for their decision. They may blame the marketers, but these were just marketers. They may even blame those of us who told them to never start smoking. They may claim we pulled over on them some reverse psychology. By telling them that smoking cigarettes would cause cancer, somehow we compelled them to smoke cigarettes.
As the risk of cancer grows, those of us who said to never smoke cigarettes will not suddenly become cancer supporters. No, we will warn everyone of the risks of cancer. We will make sure everyone knows how bad it will be. But that does not mean we are okay with the cigarette smoking. It just means we find one leads to the other and the other is terrible.
Naturally, of course, this whole column makes more sense unless you realize that smoking cigarettes is a reference to Donald Trump and cancer is a reference to Hillary Clinton's tenure in the White House. Voting for Donald Trump will lead inevitably to Hillary Clinton's presidency. It will also cause devastation down the ballot in House and Senate races.
For months and months, many of us have raised the red flag and played the role of Cassandra warning Republicans that voting for Donald Trump would doom the Republican Party. If Indiana picks up the pack of cigarettes that is the Trump campaign and starts smoking, the cancer of a Clinton Presidency will be all but guaranteed.
When it happens, the temptation of Trump supporters will be to blame those of us who said we would never support Trump. But we told them long before his nomination was assured. They knew he would not get the support he needs and still they voted for him. So do not come blaming us when Clinton gets elected. We told you not to smoke cigarettes.