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OPINION

Just Shut Up Already, Harry

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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Daniel Leal-Olivas/Pool Photo via AP

I’ve written extensively about the phenomena I call “the lucky sperm,” those people who we only know who they are, and they have everything they have, because of who they were born to. These lucky sperm who cracked the egg bring no skills or talent to the table, but they do bring an inflated sense of entitlement and an insatiable urge to bite the hand that feeds them – think James Murdoch and his left-wing crusade against his father Rupert. There are countless examples of lucky sperms – I’m sure you can come up with a list a mile long – but perhaps there is none luckier than Prince Harry.

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Honestly, what does the concept of royalty mean in 2022? If you’re not a pre-teen girl being sucked into the delusion of gender fluidity (yet), it probably means whatever the last Disney movie you watched pretended it was. 

In reality, it means you were born rich and have been engrained with an insufferable sense of entitlement. Sure, you have to attend some public events, waive at the great unwashed, and have your personal life splashed across the gossip rags, but they’re generally events people want to attend, the unwashed are kept at a distance by high-priced security, and you’ve probably slept with a lot of really good looking people because of your birth. In other words, it’s a pretty sweet deal. 

Add to that the piles of money, world travel, ability to meet whoever your heroes may be, and you’ve got yourself an idea of the perks of modern royalty. And all this for the cost of being a bipedal tourist attraction. 

Yes, it can get to be a bit much, but just pop on a hat, get a haircut, or go somewhere without a massive entourage or announcing it to the press in advance and you can do almost anything you want. 

For Prince Harry, it’s a prison. I’m sure it feels that way to him, especially since the media chased down his mother until she died in a car crash.

Still, it’s not a prison, because who alive would happily trade places with someone in prison? Now, what percentage of people alive would trade places with Prince Harry? One number is zero, the other is significantly higher. 

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Yet, Harry acts like he’s a prisoner. He wants all the trappings of royalty – the money, the fawning, the lifestyle – without any of the responsibilities. Hell, so do I. Who wouldn’t?

Harry and his woke wife spend all their time whining about how horrible their lives are, the world is, society is, etc., etc. Honestly, I’m inclined to believe them, at least on the last point. Any culture that can produce two people like them, with the world on a silver platter and they still spend their time whining like a 10-year-old who doesn’t want to eat their vegetables, could easily be classified as horrible. 

Harry told some kid “reporters” this week (and aren’t they all really acting like kids at this point?) “It's not going to be easy but I will never, ever, ever rest until I have as a parent at least tried to make the world a better place for them,” talking of his kids. 

And what constitutes “a better place” in his mind? He wants his kids to grow up “in a fairer world, a safer world, a more equal world.”

Fairer? I suppose some things are unfair, but they strike people and places randomly, without warning, which makes them “fairest” of everything, really. A safer world? Who doesn’t want that? Not much some dude and his annoying wife can do to impact peace, but if they want to fly to Moscow and convince Putin to leave Ukraine, more power to them and good luck. 

But the “more equal” part is where you lose me. That’s what liberals, in their never-ending quest to move goalposts, have done to society. They no longer talk about equality of opportunity, we pretty much have that. They want equality of outcome, which can’t happen.

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Leftists set a goal, then change it over time. Once people have bought into the concept, changing the terms is easy, and most people go right along with the ride without realizing the objective has changed – in this case from the starting line to the finish line. 

Not every child can be equal in the outcome because not all children are equal in their talent or ability. I was better at hockey than most, but really horrible at basketball, for example, even though I was always the tallest in my class. Harry is really horrible at critical thinking and picking a mate, whereas his brother, who had the same upbringing, seems excellent at both. 

If Harry really wants to make the world “more equal” he could unburden himself of all the things that clearly weigh on him, starting with his title. He doesn’t have to have one, he could renounce the whole thing. He could also renounce their podcast “deal” with Spotify, which paid them a cool $25 million explicitly because of their titles in 2020 and has produced, to date, exactly 35 minutes and 33 seconds worth of audio since. Is that “fair”? Know anyone else to whom so much was given with nothing expected in return? Is that “equal”? Absolutely not. 

Harry, you definitely had a traumatic experience in your childhood, but it’s time to man-up and stop using it as a crutch. You and your wife aren’t victims, you are your own perps. You’re the only “prisoner” in history with easy access to the key to their velvet cell – put up, or shut up. If you want to ruin your own kids, that’s on you. If you want to ruin society in pursuit of some elusive meaning in your life, get bent. 

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Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!), host of a daily radio show on WCBM in Maryland, and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter

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