What I’m Thankful For

Posted: Nov 28, 2013 12:01 AM

It’s Thanksgiving, so I thought I’d take this opportunity to acknowledge some of the things I’m thankful for this year. Problem is, I’m a cynical man. So, I’m truly thankful for some things on this list, but others are there purely for purposes of sarcasm. You decide which is which.

First, my friends and family. Blah, blah, blah, love them, blah, blah, blah. They’re “insert your favorite positive adjective here” to me. Without them…I’d probably leave the house less often and spend a lot less time on the phone. I’m kidding, of course, I am thankful for them, but that’s pretty standard fare, so on to other list items.

I’m thankful for Obamacare. I am, seriously. Without Obamacare the majority of the American people would still believe government can do big things efficiently and effectively. Progressive policies in the past have been popular, to varying degrees, because they’ve truly affected only the poor. They’ve failed miserably and trapped generations of families in poverty, but they haven’t had direct impact on most Americans. These programs allowed people who vote for Democrats to think they’re “doing good” and “helping people” by supporting a government that takes from others to do so. Obamacare smacking them in the wallet is a dose of their own medicine.

Obamacare wasn’t directed at the poor, who are covered by the inferior Medicaid. It was directed at everyone else. For the first time people who vote for Democrats are feeling the impact of the ideology they impose on others, mostly the poor. They’re being hit by the splatter that comes from feces hitting the fan. And they don’t like it.

Polls show trust in government is tanking, and faith in government is gone. Next time a snake oil salesman (or woman – looking at you, Hillary) tries to sell voters on a big government solution to a problem, they will rightly be greeted by a skepticism not seen since 1980.

Government is the progressives’ religion, and their god has been exposed as a little man with big ears behind a curtain who wants Americans to believe he’s been kept in the dark by people he hired to implement a law that bears his name. President Obama has spent the last two months attempting to bail out the Obamacare Titanic with a teacup. Millions have lost their insurance, tens of millions more will join them over the next year, and they and/or their neighbors voted for it. There will be pain, but it will not be in vain.

Tough love, especially self-inflicted tough love, is sometimes necessary to avoid repeating mistakes. As long as Republicans continue on their current path of not saying anything stupid (a tall order) AND unify around a simple, easy to understand and effective free market based alternative, they should have a very successful 2014 election.

Next, I’m thankful for Sen. Harry Reid of Nevada. The Democrat Majority Leader launched the “nuclear option” last week in the Senate, thereby empowering whoever is in his position to be the only check to presidential power when it comes to appointments. He’s also a Majority Leader with a slim majority and, provided Republicans can nominate people who can avoid saying incredibly stupid things to run against vulnerable Democrats (looking at you, Todd Akin), Reid will hold his current position for only one more year.

I shiver with glee at the anticipation of seeing any Republican Majority Leader in 2015 causing Harry Reid, who was the inspiration for the slimy character played by Dick Smothers in the movie “Casino,” to decry the very tactics in which he marinated these past six years. Just as Karma is ever but the “female dog” they say it is, schadenfreude is that much fun and then some.

I’m also thankful California keeps re-electing former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi. Not just because I thought she was really good as The Joker in the movie “The Dark Knight” (A well deserved Oscar for her there), but because there’s a perverse joy in writing “former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi.” Let me bask in that for a second.

She was in charge of the “people’s house” for only four years before the American people threw her out. She’s still actively sought after by major media outlets as the face (stop laughing) of progressives in Congress. Good! Her inability to string together a coherent sentence makes Barack Obama off teleprompter look like Barack Obama on teleprompter. Her trying to answer even a remotely challenging question is like watching someone drive a manual car for the first time – stop, start, stop, start, lather, rinse, repeat. If Nancy Pelosi didn’t exist we’d have to invent her – although nobody would believe she’s real. She is real, and she’s who the Democrats in Congress freely chose as their leader. Thank you!

There is, of course, much more to be thankful for but, in the words of the presumptive 2016 Democratic presidential nominee, what difference does it make at this point?

As you digest, watch football and prepare to trample people to get a couple hundred bucks off a big screen TV (I’m not judging, as you read this I’m most likely lacing up my Black Friday trampling shoes or picking pieces of victims out of them by the warm glow of my material triumph), take a moment to reflect on things for which you are thankful this year. Hopefully there will be much more to be thankful for on the first Tuesday after the first Monday of next November, provided Republicans don’t engage in what they excel at more than anything else – snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

By the way, if anyone at your Thanksgiving dinner takes the advice of BarackObama.com and tries to pitch the family on the virtues of Obamacare over mashed potatoes and pumpkin pie, take that opportunity to practice the “knockout game” on them. I’m kidding…mostly. Happy Thanksgiving.

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