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OPINION

Dear Uncle Sam ta

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
Dear Uncle Sam ta

First it was Jimmy Carter and his $50 cash distribution to every man, woman and child in America. The idea was to jump start the economy since nothing else in the ‘70’s seemed to be working. The idea withered on the vine.

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Next came Ben Bernanke and his speech about dropping $100 bills out of a helicopter for everyone to gather, and like Jimmy Carter’s plan, give the economy a much needed boost. It remained an academic idea but established the Chairman’s longstanding nickname, Helicopter Ben.

Now, the “hidden government of the United States”, Council of Foreign Relations (CFR), has produced a report declaring that the best possible step for revitalizing the economy is direct payments to the languishing middle class. They made note that low interest rates and Quantitative Easing are having no real effect on the spending habits of most Americans which is critical for growth.

They recognize that the lending habits of the Too Big Too Fail Banks (TBTFs) has been woefully absent, self-serving and not likely to change in the future. Therefore, stealing a page from many of the existing government social programs, the report suggests bypassing the middle man and crediting people’s accounts directly.

Food stamps, child credits and disability payments go directly to the needy and can be expected to be spent in the economy as quickly as received. The sale of beer, fast foods, flat screen TVs and the latest smart phone seem to surge each time a government payment is made. A real economic boost.

The problem, not addressed in the report, as I see it, is that the middle class will, like the banks, not do what’s expected of them. Most will retire debt, buy stocks or simply put it under the mattress for a rainy day. These actions would in no way be beneficial or jump start the economy.

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Might I suggest since the CFR (Fabian Society) ultimately controls, that they become more practical in their approach. The ultimate socialistic order will predetermine what the newly distributed money be used for.

As an example if Caterpillar is continuing to show declining worldwide sales then each neighborhood in America should be delivered a small backhoe for all the residents’ personal use. The neighbors would have a toy and Caterpillar would have a direct infusion of cash.

Every kitchen in America should have the newest microwave-ordered-delivered-and paid for by the government directly to GE.

Of course no child should be left behind so the newest video game will show up on every doorstep compliments of Uncle Sam.

Jimmy, Ben and the CFR were all on the right track but you can’t depend on the public to act as they’re supposed to, therefore, cut them out and pay the struggling and needy manufacturers directly.

Perhaps periodically we could ask, like a letter to Santa, for something we really need or want and if it appears to help the economy it could be added to the list.

I’d like to start by asking Uncle Sam ta for a new set of golf clubs.

I hear that industry is in steep decline and needs a boost.

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