Father Donovan announces he is running a Christmas play at the mall, so Stan Smith, the conservative Christian CIA agent/idiot dad, expects to play Jesus Christ on the cross. He says, "I'm the most devout member of the church," and he also says, "When it comes to Christianity, that's the money shot." Stan is told he's too fat and is cast as Santa Claus. When he discovers that the part of Jesus has gone instead to the show's bisexual space alien character, Roger, who boasts he's working on his "savior bulge," Stan beats Roger senseless.
Later, people watch the shocking TV news footage of "Santa" beating "Jesus." A reporter says "Santa" used "anti-Jesus slurs" as he yelled, "You don't deserve to be on that cross, you lazy wine-loving bisexual!" The pope holds the phone and says, "Are you watching this (bleeped S-word)?" The priest complains to Stan that church leaders are chewing his "a-- off." Roger the space alien fondly remembers the beating as he watches and recounts how before he went unconscious, he was "finally able to achieve orgasm."
Senseless violence also was added. As the episode begins, Roger is perfecting his eggnog recipe. Here's how he knows it is just right: He feeds it to a rat in a cage, which then chews off the head of another rat and then explodes in a pile of blood. Later in the episode, Stan shoots a dog he thinks is a "hellhound." Instead, it's a guide dog for a blind man. The blind man then walks into traffic and is run over by a semi.
Some really sick people think these plot happenings are hilarious in a Christmas-themed episode. So much for peace on earth and good will toward men.
This twisted, bloody and relentlessly religion-trashing episode was brought to you by a whole list of advertisers trying to sell things to children and teens: McDonald's, Wrigley's 5 gum, the Sony PlayStation, Apple's iPad, the dancing hip-hop hamsters who sell the Kia Soul automobile, and the new family movie "We Bought a Zoo." Apparently, no one's concerned about the message this sends to children at Christmastime.
Instead, too many spirit-crushing school bureaucrats are outraged that someone might say "merry Christmas" in a classroom. The Batavia City School District in upstate New York explicitly instructed employees, "Expressions related to specific religions, e.g., 'Merry Christmas,' should not be included in any spoken or written remarks."
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