The Beltway Cowgirl is making the commie cable rounds talking about running for president – of the United States, if you can believe it. She might as well – phony Larry Hoganmania has bitten the dust and the Jeffrey Toobins of Never Trump aren’t going to Zoom call themselves. I, for one, strongly support this ridiculous indulgence by a bitter mediocrity who is about to join her moist, sobbing minion Adam Kinzinger on the unemployment line. The only thing is that I suspect she would get some pleasure out of her inevitable humiliation and I do not want to contribute in any way to the hideous woman’s joy.
There’s this weird bunch of COVID lovers out there. Some people seem to want it back. There are more and more people in airports and elsewhere around the country (I have been traveling for my new book) who are wearing masks, and places like San Diego and Los Angeles are talking about reintroducing mandates. Even Grandpa Badfinger is getting to the act - he’s vaxxed to the maxx and he still got it, but he shrugged it off. If that elderly zombie can beat it, the new variant is a puny weakling we should laugh and point at. And at those who love their Wuhan Flu.
HECK YEAH CHENEY SHOULD RUN
I really want this. I want her to run, lose, and slink away broken and humiliated with a big .5 percent of the vote. Let’s formally purge this human hairball from our party once and for all.
The whole idea of it is so intensely ludicrous that you must have a heart of stone not to laugh at her and the sad sacks pushing this failquest. But then, if you live in DC it makes perfect sense. She’s super popular because, like all liberals, she hates real Americans. She’s the Swamp’s choice.
Let’s be clear – she is a bad person, a liar and a fool whose self-regard is so hilariously overblown that you stare at her in wonder. Talk about believing your own hype – this sour harpy really believes she is a patriot? Yeah, aren’t all the Cheneys? Always willing to fight some imagined enemy at home or abroad to the last drop of you or your kid’s blood.
Imagine a Cheney in uniform. Stop laughing – that’s mean!
Her disgusting and evil participation in the corrupt kongressional committee, which takes a giant Schiff on the constitutional rights this doofus pretends to defend, disqualifies her not only from the Republican Party but from polite society. If the GOP has any sense it will investigate the investigators and their fascist actions, but that’s sure a big “if.”
What lane would she run in? Is there some nostalgia for the Bush era we’ve overlooked? She could be the Republican who hates Republicans, which is the media’s favorite kind.
But who would be her constituency in terms of actual voters? She is a Virginian pretending to represent Wyoming. Once the people of Wyoming utterly reject her, she will never look back. She’ll make the rounds of the MSNBCNN shows and get fawning write-ups by the eunuchs at the Bulwark and probably get a gig at some loser think tank and remain on the fringes of power forever, the reliable former Republican they can call to stab her party in the back.
I don’t think she will run, but I sure hope she does. I want the chance to laugh at her like the people of Wyoming are going to have in a few weeks.
THE COVID LOVERS
Some people loved the Wuhan Flu. Now they miss it and want it back. It’s hard to believe, and it’s kind of horrific considering how many people died, but for a sad segment of the population this was the most exciting and rewarding thing they ever lived through. And it was fun to work at home on Zoom! They miss it, and now that some minor variant is going around, they really want it to never end..
What’s to love about a respiratory virus? The two years of COVD madness were interesting, a break from the drudgery of peace and prosperity (on the upside, I guess, those challenges are gone) for many people who have lived lives of ease in America. There are no existential challenges to face (at least none the establishment will acknowledge), so they need to create them.
People need challenges. They need dragons to slay. And what is better than a virus that probably won’t kill you, but just might. It’s scary, but you’re probably safe. It’s a thrill, of a sort, for a soft and weak population of spoiled upper-middle class people who generate most of the Karens. It’s like global warming - there’s lots of talk of existential threats without much actual threat – at least not to the Karen Kontingent.
They always lied about it, from their ever-changing mask baloney to the vaxx fibs. And now they admit it. Truth was always optional. Science was whatever it needed to be. The only thing that mattered was them getting what they want, and what they want is perpetual pandemic panic.
It fulfills them. Which is about the saddest thing imaginable.
Get my just released non-fiction book We’ll Be Back: The Fall and Rise of America, but don’t forget my Kelly Turnbull series of conservative action novels set in America after a notional national divorce. The latest is The Split, but get all these action-packed bestsellers, including People's Republic, Indian Country, Wildfire, Collapse, and Crisis! Plus, keep up the fight by joining Townhall VIP, including an extra Wednesday column, my weekly Stream of Kurtiousness video, and the Unredacted podcast!
My super-secret email address is Kurt.schlichter@townhall.com