Don’t Freak Out When We Lose the Birthright Citizenship Case
Pam Bondi Deserved to Be Fired Long Ago
Police Arrest Man for Shooting Alleged Pedophile Soliciting Minors for Sex
Trump Reminds Iran That the Clock Is Ticking
He Used Drugs to Exploit His Victims – Now He's Facing Decades in...
An Easter Message to the British People
Trump Administration to Investigate Spain's 'Human Rights Failures' After Euthanasia of Ga...
And That Folks Is America
Stephen A. Smith’s Surprising Take on Trump Attending SCOTUS Oral Arguments and Birthright...
The Black Lives That Don't Matter
Lawmakers Push to Reform This Abused Federal Drug Pricing Program
President Trump: The Biggest Tax-Cutter in History
Live Nation’s Predatory Grift
Alabama Therapist Sentenced to Over 4 Years in $700K Medicaid Fraud Case
You Won't Believe the Latest Lie Leftists Tried to Push About Trump
OPINION

Martha's Jellies

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
Martha's Jellies

If nobody else, Marc Morano, minority communications director for the U.S. Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works, got a chuckle out of the Massachusetts woman who is blaming her daughter's "nasty jellyfish sting" on global warming.

Advertisement

Posted Tuesday on Huffington Post, and then redistributed by Mr. Morano on Capitol Hill, Laurie David writes that several days ago she "heard a blood-curdling scream from my twelve-year-old who was swimming twenty feet away from me in a large salt water tidal pond. What could possibly have happened?"

After all, she goes on to observe, "seconds before she was laughing and splashing with her friend. Now she was crying with a huge red welt on her leg."

Mrs. David draws attention to "hundreds" of red stinging jellyfish that "have just shown up around Martha's Vineyard and the Cape like never seen before." She further cites an article in last Sunday's New York Times, which says scientists are blaming a number of factors for an increase in jellyfish worldwide, including overfishing and a rise in seawater temperature caused by "global warming."

"Back at the pond my daughter's friend felt the effects of global warming herself not eight minutes later. She cried too," Mrs. David adds.

Columnist's note: Mrs. David might actually thank "global warming" for providing the ground on Martha's Vineyard for her and her daughter to stand on.

Prior to hiking a stretch of the Appalachian Trail last week, I read the 1998 best-seller "A Walk in the Woods" by Bill Bryson. Consider the following passage:

Advertisement

"And here is a thing that most of us fail to appreciate: we are still in an ice age, only now we experience it for just part of the year. Snow and ice and cold are not really typical features on earth. Taking the long view, Antarctica is actually a jungle. (It's just having a chilly spell).

"At the very peak of the last ice age 20,000 years ago, 30 percent of the earth was under ice. Today, 10 percent still is. There have been at least a dozen ice ages in the last two million years, each lasting about 100,000 years. The most recent intrusion, called the Wisconsinian ice sheet, spread down from the polar regions over much of Europe and North America, growing to depths of up to two miles …

"As it soaked up the earth's free water, sea levels fell by 450 feet. Then, about 10,000 years ago … it began to melt back. No one knows why. What it left in its wake was a landscape utterly transformed. It dumped Long Island, Cape Cod, Nantucket, and most of Martha's Vineyard where previously there had just been sea. …"

ALREADY COLD

Given the suddenly high energy costs in America, certainly residents of usually frigid upstate New York are hoping for a warmer-than-normal winter season.

As Rep. John Hall, New York Democrat, points out: "Families in my district use heating oil to stave off winter cold, and too many of them are already shivering. We're not even into the heating season yet, and already prices in the Hudson Valley are over … 70 percent more than last year."

Advertisement

FREE NOBAMA

What's all the buzz about the NOBAMA bumper sticker?

Ted Jackson is founder and president of Spalding Group, a principal supplier to the last six Republican presidential campaigns, including John McCain's current bid. Besides that, he is personally funding the giveaway of up to one million "NOBAMA" bumper stickers, which he says are "hugely popular" right now.

Mr. Jackson explains that he is making the independent expenditure as a direct response to MoveOn.org's offer of a free Barack Obama bumper sticker. He adds that since its introduction by the Spalding Group, sales of the entire NOBAMA product line have been "unprecedented."

To receive a free "NOBAMA" bumper sticker, enclose a self-addressed stamped envelope and mail it to: NOBAMA Free Bumper Sticker c/o Ted Jackson, 2306 Frankfort Ave., Louisville, KY, 40206.

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Townhall Videos

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement